62-year-old Indian man admits to sexually touching sleeping woman on plane.

Tulika shared the link below with this message:

“Treatment of sexual assault in Western Society – 

I request you to publish this news regarding sexual assault and how actually it should be dealt in a civilized society. What actually culture and civilisation means and gives support to its member.”

What do you think would have been the first reactions if this crime had taken place in India?

Indian man admits to sexually touching sleeping woman on plane

NEW YORK:  A 62-year-old Indian man has pleaded guilty to sexually touching a woman seated next to him aboard a flight from Houston to Newark and faces two years in prison.

The accused, Devender Singh, a resident of Louisiana

…  The charge carries a maximum potential penalty of two years in prison and a USD 250,000 fine. He is scheduled to be sentenced in October.  … Singh was seated next to a woman who occupied a window seat on a United Airlines flight from Houston to Newark. While the plane was in the air, the woman fell asleep and awoke to find him kissing her face with his hand inside her shirt.

After pushing Singh off of her and telling him to get away, the woman complained to a flight crew member about the incident and asked that the police be present when the plane landed.

The federal government has exclusive jurisdiction over all sexual abuse cases that occur on aircraft in flight in the US.

 

These TOI comments reflect how sexual crimes are viewed by many Indians,

1. Many seem to consider sexual assaults a natural outcome of men finding women sexually attractive.

Airliners has to allot seats in such a way to prevent this type of incidents, urge and attraction is God’s creation between two sexes. Our elders out of evolution and experience they have advocated,wearing veil,wearing non explosive dress code as advised by elderly intelligent people,monogamy,advise giving respect to fair sex and exhibiting their private parts publicly.

Fact: A response to: Why we think women activists should change their attitude of “wear what you like” [Link]

2. Others believe it’s young men who commit such crimes because they have no control over their ‘natural instincts’.

Hahahahah such a disgusting and funny thing i read today !! :v :p 60+ yrs old person hahha Chokra jawaan re jawaan re !! [the boy is young, is young]

Fact: What makes Men Rape? [link]

3. The idea that sexual assaults are caused by a man’s inability to ‘control their instincts’  is deep rooted.

A very shameful act that too from a 62 year old. When will people learn to control their instincts? The punishment is good and he deserves it for putting India and Indians to shame.

Fact: The rapists often don’t see their actions as crimes, the police said, and don’t expect the victims to report them. [link]

Why don’t we hear any talk about the requirement for consent in any sexual activity? Maybe because we fear that’s Sex Education?

Also, media campaigns could help create awareness about how often Sexual Crimes are not crimes of ‘lust’ or ‘natural urges’ but of hate, aggression and revenge (as in ‘Teaching a lesson’ to the woman) and sometimes of simply not knowing that any sexual act without consent is a crime.

Related Posts:

Rapist said that coming from Afghanistan meant he didn’t understand what ‘consent’ was.

“I am safe because I’m very careful in the way I behave and dress in public, on the streets.”

“Sometimes it seems like every single thing I do has the potential to be something ‘provocative’.” 

Have a Good Time in India, Sister (Gounderbrownie)

She started a fight between two men?

The night I was not an easy prey.

‘“Why would this girl lie? After all she is taking the blame on herself”, said the police officer to the criminal infront of me.’What’s the best way to fight for your rights and freedoms and to prevent Talibanization of India?

Allahabad girl Aarti Yadav beats harasser, sets bike on fire

“I will not sit back and allow the image of India’s men to be tarnished by an article that does not articulate other sides to India.”

“… people will say we encouraged these men to follow us… even though we are innocent”

Why should all acts of sexual harassment be taken seriously, even when there is no grievous physical injury?

What did Sharad Yadav mean by, ‘Who amongst us has not followed girls?’

Does porn affect how men view sex, women and children?

Does porn affect how people view sex, women and children? Do you think porn encourages men to rape children (or anybody)?

If rape scenes in movies are said to affect the way Indian men view sex (i.e. men want, women provide; women never want hence can never consent or else are ‘loose character’; men always want sex; men can rape for sex; men are provoked by loose women to rape them; women must marry the rapist to save their honor etc) then what about porn?

Would free access to sex education change this? If people knew or acknowledged that sex was meant to be a consensual and mutually pleasurable act, and that sex was not against Indian values, would there be better understanding that those who rape are not sex-starved people but criminals with serious and dangerous mental and social issues?

Do you agree with the comment shared below this news link?

Gurgaon: A five-year-old girl was brutally raped and then abandoned near a metro station in Gurgaon on Saturday, the police have said. The minor has suffered severe internal injuries and is being treated at Delhi’s Safdarjung Hospital.

According to the police, the girl was allegedly lured away by a man who offered to give her food during a langar (community lunch) near the Bristol Hotel in Gurgaon. He later raped her….

[5-year-old brutally raped, abandoned near metro station in Gurgaon]

Do you agree with this comment:

People shout at top of their voices against the police, the government and the nation itself. No one speaks about the abyssmal downfall in values. Will any group concerned with this, fight against the free access to porn, which is the root cause of men becoming animals? No. Majority people will fight against any ban on porn. So whom do you blame? Blame yourselves for spawning these dreadful animals. [5-year-old brutally raped, abandoned near metro station in Gurgaon]

Related Posts:

Many of us view watching porn as a harmless activity…

Three BJP Ministers, including the Women and Child Welfare Minister caught watching porn in assembly. (Ministers caught on camera watching a rape video)

Is there any other way this crime could have been controlled? (Gurgaon, MG Road)

Shouldn’t Mamta Sharma and Kailash Vijayvargiya be held accountable for the statements they make?

How did Mamta Sharma and Kailash Vijayvargiya come to the conclusion that certain kind of clothes worn by women would find approval (?) of Indian sexual criminals?

Did they make a genuine effort to understand sexual crimes?

Did they rely on the recommendations made by those who think watching porn is the way to understand criminal assaults on women?

Or, like many others who offer prompt advice, are they using Bollywood movies to understand sexual crimes?

Is it difficult for them to believe that sexual crimes thrive on a culture of tolerance and even abetment to sexual assaults?

Why don’t we see those responsible for women’s welfare, empowerment and safety, actually conduct surveys and analyze results to find out why India is the fourth amongst the worst countries for being a woman?

Why not give sincere thought to what kind of attitudes and tolerance encourages Indian sexual criminals to become so fearless?

Or what gives Indian sexual criminals the  assurance that some Indian men and women would always find justifications for what made them hate, strip, beat and rape an innocent citizen?

At the very least, they could resist the urge to make statements that convey to a criminal that crime would be tolerated.

Here are two samples of the kind of statements that assure sexual criminals that their acts would find tolerance. These statements also discourage victims from reporting assaults, which is further encouragement for sexual criminals.

Women’s safety depends on what they wear, MP minister says

“Women’s fashion, lifestyle and conduct should be in accordance with Indian culture … women should not wear clothes which provoke others (to misbehave with them),” Madhya Pradesh industries minister Kailash Vijayvargiya said here yesterday.

“Women should dress in such a way that they invoke respect in others. However, unfortunately women are dressing provocatively, which is leading to deviation in society,” he said referring to the infamous Guwahati molestation incident.

“After 64 years of freedom, it is not right to give blanket directions and say don’t wear this or don’t wear that. Be comfortable, but at the same time be careful about how you dress,” she had said.

—————-

“Be comfortable, but at the same time, be careful about how you dress… Aping the west blindly is eroding our culture and causing such crimes to happen.” – NCW (National Commission for Women) Chairperson Mamta Sharma

———–

And here is why creating a culture of tolerance to sexual crimes is dangerous.

Inmates raped at will by outsiders in Hooghly rehabilitation home

http://articles.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/2012-07-13/kolkata/32663133_1_guriya-death-certificate-hooghly

GURAP (HOOGHLY): The probe into the mysterious death and burial of a 32-year-old woman in a Hooghly rehabilitation home has unearthed a horror house where inmates were regularly raped and tortured by outsiders. It was virtually a free for all — anyone could walk in after sunset and do whatever he pleased with the women, who are either mentally challenged or speech and hearing impaired, sources said.

Police said it is quite possible that Guriya, whose body was exhumed from the Khajurdaha centre on Wednesday, was sexually tortured before she was killed. Her body was covered with injuries.

The Congress and the Left staged demonstrations to protest the alleged torture of inmates at the rehab home. “Not only the one in Khajurdaha, most of the homes for the destitute are in a miserable condition. Sexual abuse is common in homes for women. In case of physically challenged and mentally handicapped women, it is even worse. They cannot protest against the abuse. No home can run without government licence or funding but there is hardly any monitoring,” said Shampa Sengupta of Shruti, an organization that fights for the rights of physically and mentally challenged women.

____________

Haryana shocker: Women, children raped in government shelter

Rohtak: It is a sordid tale of exploitation and official involvement from Rohtak in Haryana where women and children at a government-aided shelter in the Chief Minister’s own constituency are being abused and raped.

…pregnant inmates were forced to undergo painful abortions that verged on torture, and were gangraped by police officers.

—————–

Bangalore: Mentally challenged woman raped by 70-yr-old

A 70-year-old man was arrested for allegedly raping his neighbour, a 22-year-old mentally challenged woman, on Wednesday.

The accused, a father of 14 kids, has been identified as Dastagir Khan. He allegedly broke into her house in Neelasandra and raped her around 4 pm.

_______________

Daughter in law locked in cowshed, raped by spouse, neighbours and others.

The rapists often don’t see their actions as crimes, the police said, and don’t expect the victims to report them.

Why was this radio cabbie, a rapist, not afraid of being arrested?

One rapist let off with a few slaps, another rapist allowed to kill for family honor.

In Rape Culture, we understand that if the rapist was living alone, away from his native place, he could lose control over himself.

Related Posts:

Will Mamta Sharma please shut up?

Rape and clothing: How it’s all dressed up – A guest post by Praveen Talwar.

Here’s why I think the society should not obsess over a woman’s virginity.

Here’s an article from TOI that I think encourages sexist fallacies. “Great things about being a virgin woman“. (Thanks for the link A and Remya)

The article tells women to “just remember that there are many advantages of being a virgin. It is one of the most special gifts god has given you.”

Here’s why I think the society, men and women, should not obsess over woman’s virginity (and sex life). Rambling thoughts, might edit and add links later.

An obsession with women’s virginity makes it look like we are okay with double standards and hypocrisy. (Also, since everybody loses their virginity only after sexual experience, and only some are expected to preserve it we don’t think of questioning the need to preserve inexperience.)

This obsession starts connecting a woman’s morals with her sex life. It indicates that women who do not refuse to have intercourse until they are married are somehow not nice people. We know this is not true. A woman’s sex life is just a part of her life and personality – focusing on it makes it seem like her ‘body’ is more important than herself. It’s disrespectful to women, for a society to value her body parts more than her life – I think it is at the root of a lot of other evils and controls on women’s life.

It also prevents women (and indirectly men) from experiencing sex – obsession with virginity makes sex look like something women do for men, like something women give and men take. (“So now, save your virginity. Don’t give it away on a platter.”)

It encourages sexual crimes. One, by making a serious crime become more about a woman’s ‘lost virginity’ and secondly, by making it shameful for women to even talk about this ‘great loss’. Some Indians see it as so shameful that they kill the victims. The shame has now become a habit and the same mindset also affects how we deal with Child Sexual Abuse.

Since the obsession involves only 50% of the populace, it has also resulted in millions of children and women being trafficked and kept in inhuman conditions – because Patriarchy believes that the 50% for whom the virginity is being preserved have their ‘needs’.

When we see sex as something men want and women provide, then we see our Police and rapists (and many other people) believing that women, who are not criminals, sex workers or just bad people, cannot want sex. And once it is established that all good women hate sex, then it becomes easier to silence rape victims by conveying they ‘asked for it’.

It prevents women (and society and law makers) from seeing sex as an activity where women are equal participants. Often just their participation (and anything that leads to it) is seen as condemnable.

This also affects how widows, divorcees and rape victims are seen – as ‘used goods’. This obsession also leads to young women being killed if they are suspected of not being virgins.

Please think about it, how does virginity benefit women?

Maybe it assured a father (before the DNA testing days) that the first child he had with a virgin most probably did carry his genes – but isn’t there more to a man-woman relationship, doesn’t it indicate lack of trust and a lack of respect for the mother?

Maybe it also assured their partners that any sexually transmitted diseases they have, have been passed on by their other non-virgin partners. It also made it easier for their partners to pretend the woman was frigid.

Maybe it meant that many women never knew their bodies could not just produce babies and please their husbands, they could also be used for their own pleasure.

How is lack of knowledge and experience a ‘virtue’?

Now when women are marrying later than ever before, I wonder if it makes sense to wait to have sex until they are married. Who does it really benefit and why?

The article claims, “…there are many advantages of being a virgin. It is one of the most special gifts god has given you.”

Is Virginity a gift from god? Who is this gift meant for? Does this gift from god make women lead better lives?

Obsession with virginity affects children too. We worship mothers who have husbands (it is assumed that they were virgins till they were married), and condemn mothers who don’t – their children (boys or girls) are ostracized.

The articles lists these benefits for virgin women.

“No pregnancy fears:” – Readily available information about contraception would be a more practical option, though in some cultures married couples are advised abstinence to prevent pregnancy.

“No STDs:” Doesn’t this apply to men and women both? Today in India many married women and their children have AIDS. These women were virgins when they married and their non virgin (and not necessarily faithful) husbands passed on the virus to them. Some countries in Africa and other countries that obsess with women’s ‘purity’ face similar problems. If virginity was not such an issue, all these other related issues would not be brushed under the carpet and serious discussion would be possible.

“No emotional trauma of a relationship: Sometimes there is nothing left in a relationship after sex. Love is not all about sex so there are many things a couple can do without sex in a relationship. Remember, a sexual disappointment can make you feel hurt, lonely and angry.”

I would have thought knowledge and experience should help in such cases. And emotional trauma in a relationship is possible with or without sex, unless one of the partners insists on seeing virginity as a ‘gift from god’.

And does this imply that it is okay if there is no ‘relationship after sex’ for married couples?

Agree with there are many things that couple can do in a relationship – but didn’t understand why sex shouldn’t be one of those things, if both the partners want it and no coercion or emotional blackmail is used?

“Your man will feel so proud and happy: It’s a fact; most men still prefer a virgin woman. No guys want to think about his girl having sex with other guys. Even though virgin women are not sexually experienced, men still love them and feel more sexually excited. He will respect your innocence, and also there won’t be any arguments on your past relationships.”

Sexist generalizations. So a woman should stay a virgin to make a man ‘sexually excited’? (Such non-virgin intentions are innocent?) Also consider – what would make a man prefer a virgin? Fear of being compared to her other partners? What about the woman having similar concerns?

“You are pure as an angel: Virgins are probably one of the sanest people on earth. Most virgin women have morals and respect themselves. Also they take relationship and marriage very seriously.”

This made me wonder if this article intended to provoke reactions like this post.

Or, Poe’s Law?  (Thanks Natasha S 🙂 )

So do you think women and the society benefit from women ‘preserving their virginity’? How?

What do you think would change if such controls were not there?

Related Posts:

Why exactly do we disapprove of Live-in relationships and Premarital sex?
Driven by tradition, Kanjarbhat elders force Virginity tests.
Shameless – By: Priya Alika Elias, Ultra Violet, Indian Feminists Unplugged.
Great Things About Being A Dimwit – Women’s Web, Aparna
We like our virgins – Amit Sharma

Three BJP Ministers, including the Women and Child Welfare Minister caught watching porn in assembly.

I am sure nobody is really surprised that three ministers were caught watching ‘obscene video’ in Karnataka assembly. I am just glad they are caught on camera. Maybe now we can expect stronger attempts at censorship to protect our religious and cultural sensibilities.

CC Patil and Lakshman Savadi were caught watching an obscene video on their mobile phones on Tuesday while the Assembly was in session. A regional TV channel aired the footage of the duo watching the clippings when the Assembly was debating the issue of hoisting of Pakistan national flag in a town in Bijapur district on the New Year’s day. [Link]

This post is not about my views on whether or not watching porn should be a crime. C C Patil is was the Women and Child Welfare Minister, this is what he said about last month about sexual crimes against women.

Women should know how much skin they should cover: Karnataka minister

“I personally don’t favour women wearing provocative clothes …” He also said women should know how much skin they should cover.

… Patil said incidents like rape and sexual harassment occur when moral values among men decline – the subtext being women dressing “provocatively” cause men’s morals to nosedive.

….

Perhaps apprehending he would be accused of being a misogynist, Patil hastily added, “Over the centuries, we have given respectful position and dignified status to women. We worship women in many ways. As a mark of respect to women, many rivers are named after them in the country which only indicates the respect we have towards women.”

[From here]

I believe anybody who talks of naming rivers after women when asked about an average woman’s safety doesn’t care what happens to an average woman. If he then start talking about women’s clothing causing men’s morality to nosedive – then maybe he is  making excuses for himself.

Karnataka state had recently banned a peaceful protest against sexual harassment (Slut walk) and has in the past defended violent attack and molesting of innocent citizens in a Mangalore pub (resulting in the now famous Pink Chaddi Campaign). This is how Savadi reacted to being caught watching porn in the House.

After local TV channels began airing the footage, Savadi reportedly blocked power supply in his constituency, Athani, in north Karnataka. He said later, “I was watching the video clip of how a woman was raped by four people to know about the incident and prepare for a discussion on the ill-effects of a rave party in Udupi recently. I do not have the cheap mentality to see pornographic visuals.”[Link]

I wanted to call this post – We worship women in many ways. – C C Patil.

When they don’t even understand crime, how are they ever going to begin controlling it?

Andhra Pradesh Police chief Dinesh Reddy has stated that women who wear fashionable clothes provoke men, leading to increase in rape cases. Claiming that modern women are more vulnerable to rape, Reddy said that fashionable dresses worn by them was one of the factors leading to increase in rape cases in the country. [Link]

Why do those who are supposed to be informed, support and encourage crimes with their ignorance? Did this man who should definitely know better ever check the statistics to find out how many rape victims are ‘fashionable’? I have blogged about [Click to read Who Gets Raped link] this dangerous myth –

1. It ensures the criminal is not blamed, makes them fearless. Like this Radio cabbie so recently who had no fear of being arrested, please think, ‘Why was this radio cabbie, a rapist, not afraid of being arrested?‘

2. It also confuses the criminal, rapists are known to be unsure if rape is a crime or not, ‘The rapists often don’t see their actions as crimes, the police said, and don’t expect the victims to report them.‘

Younger rapists are being misguided into believing that women must save the culture by dressing according to their approval, or approval of any male who happens to glance at them.

And yet criminals sense they dare not assault every woman dressed in salwar kameez – this leads to resentment and support for incidents like the attack on women in a Mangalore Pub. (Please note, it was planned and not an impulsive act, some men and women thought it was justified because women were fashionable).

3. It makes the victims so ashamed of having asked for the crime, that it discourages them and their families from reporting the crime.

3. It sets a dangerous precedence. The entire system, even the victims start wondering if perhaps they are responsible for the crime. They might wonder, if men in regressive societies where women are not respected or valued are more prone to ‘losing control’? And if that is true, then isn’t chemical castration a more practical solution?

4. Such statements make women and their families feel insecure and leads to girls not being allowed to study, travel, make careers or even walk out of a violent marriage.

Can’t such statements be legally challenged?

Charakan shared a link that confirms that humans and macaque monkeys tend to empathize with those who they feel are like themselves – so I am likely to empathize with women and men who stand for justice and logic, and does that mean those who think men can’t help but rape a fashionably dressed woman – feel they (or their close ones) might do the same if they saw a fashionably dressed woman? I am not being sarcastic – this is a serious question.

To men: Do men who support other rapists (by minimizing or justifying their crimes) think they might rape a woman if she was fashionably dressed?

And to women: Do you think your son, husband, close friends, male relatives might rape a woman if she was wearing ‘fashionable’ clothes?

Here’s another reason to be grateful that we have free social media as a platform to vent our angst. Just when I was feeling hopeless I saw I wasn’t alone. ( Link shared by Charakan.)

A Modest Proposal for the Castration of Male Police Officers : (Andhra Police Chief Dinesh Reddy Holds ‘Fashionable Women’ Responsible for Increase in Rape)

Related posts: (Click to read)

1. Those charged with our safety should have a true understanding of what it is to be a survivor of sexual assault — slut or otherwise.

2. Segregation, lack of sex education and taboos – Indian cities dominate ‘sex’ search online; Pak leads list but 7 Indian cities in top10.

3. Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work!

4. And just yesterday I blogged about why sexual criminals in India, seem to have no fear of law or social stigma.

Do you think men in regressive societies where women are not respected or valued are more prone to ‘losing control’?

This was a comment on Bhagwad’s post, I have heard this before. What do you think?

“The provocative dressing sense and the profession (modelling) of these particular girls are making them as soft targets”

It doesn’t mean it is their fault!!
Yes, a woman has the right to dress however she wants. Obviously. The man’s actions are his fault, alone. Completely true.
So after she’s harassed you say it was his fault; is saying that going to stop that particular man from harassing other women in future?

Is wearing less clothing because you have the right to going to reduce your chances of being harassed by that very wrong and very perverted man? Maybe wearing a loose-fitting punjabi dress, for instance, might reduce the chances!

It’s not the woman’s fault, but she has to bear the consequences every time. Every woman knows that. Is wearing ‘provocative’ clothing just that necessary that you can risk bearing the consequences of a man’s mistakes?! To each his own, man!!

My response:

1. Do you think men in societies where women are not respected or valued are more prone to ‘losing control‘?

2. Making a man responsible for his actions would discourage him and other men from repeating the action in future.

3. Blaming the women has resulted in the society and the culprits taking  sexual crimes lightly.  The offender sees that the only person who is supposed to take any (real) measures to stop the crime is the victim. Her isolation obviously emboldens him, it’s not that he doesn’t realize his actions are wrong, but the society’s reactions assure him that his crime would not be taken seriously. [The rapists often don’t see their actions as crimes, and don’t expect the victims to report them.]

4. Sexual criminals also gain confidence when instead of dealing with them firmly, societies add more controls on women’s lives and activities.[Link] Women are asked to watch how they dress, laugh, walk, move, travel, socialize, work, dream, live, drink, eat, not watch movies, not sit in parks, not sing in public, not fall in love etc to stay safe from sexual crimes.

5. Following all these rules, sometimes having no lives worth living, have not made women safer. Fully covered women of all ages who break no such safety rules still get raped, inside their homes, at their workplaces, in broad daylight.

6. What if a woman likes to travel, earn, ride a motorbike, swim, sing, dance, dress, socialize…?  Fear  and mistaken ideas of honor  (more than safety and trauma) have made harmless activities into social crimes for women.

7. I think, not having a voice makes women more unsafe than going out after dark ‘provocatively dressed’.

And all this begins with women being asked not to dress provocatively.

So what would really help?

1. Women who look like they would not be easy victims are generally safer.

2. Sexual criminals are like all other criminals, generally cowardly bullies, if they fear being blamed, held responsible, convicted and jailed they would behave.

3. Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work! [Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work!]

How do you think did blaming the victims of sexual assaults started?

Related Posts:

The rapists often don’t see their actions as crimes, the police said, and don’t expect the victims to report them.

Provocatively Dressed

She does not invite it.

The way a woman dresses…

Said Noodle strap to the Sari

Not just a pair of jeans

So why do we wear clothes again?

No jeans for an Indian Daughter in law.

Can’t end marriage over a sari.

What women ‘choose’ to wear…

What do ‘Modest’ women have that their ‘Immodest’ sisters don’t…

Written in a hurry, please excuse any typos! Will correct once I am back.

Slut Walk: Instead of focusing on the issues the media focuses on how women must protest.

What is Slut Walk?

A Canadian Police officer stated that women could avoid sexual crimes if they did not dress like sluts. Such ignorant statements encourage criminals. In India, “The rapists often don’t see their actions as crimes, the police said, and don’t expect the victims to report them.” [Click to read] Because they are confident that the victims would be blamed for ‘sexualising their environment’.

Women in Canada protested by marching, dressed as they pleased to convey that they expected ‘Those charged with our safety should have a true understanding of what it is to be a survivor of sexual assault — slut or otherwise‘

Why call it Slut Walk?

“The name was meant to be provocative. The protests that followed around the world wanted to show continuity with that protest, so they kept the same name.

By using that name, women are saying, if I’m a slut (i.e. a woman who sleeps with many men) you still don’t have the right to touch me, unless I say you do. That prostitutes have the right to refuse sex and be respected. That however provocatively I dress or my sexual conduct in general does not give you the right to act on your misguided assumption that I am up for grabs.” (Bride’s comment on Chandni’s post)
So do not use how a woman is dressed as an excuse to harass/rape/molest/abuse women.

Why should it be safe for a woman to be seen as a slut?

Because Slut Excuses continue ignorance about sexual crimes. Educated, well read people are known feel  that sexual crimes are caused by victims and not the rapists.

Also because many other problems women face are linked to what is seen as dressing or acting or living or walking or socializing like sluts.

Who is a slut? Does a slut rob, kill or break any laws?

The term applied to an individual who is considered to have loose sexual morals or who is sexually promiscuous. The term is generally applied to women as an insult. [from Wikipedia]

Slut Walk questions the assumption that a woman’s personal life should have an impact on how crimes against her are dealt with. In India a woman’s lifestyle has been used by rapists, the society, the media and the police to justify sexual crimes against them.

* * *

An article in The Hindustan Times claimed that slut walk in Delhi doesn’t make sense in a country where, 10 million babies have been killed in the womb because they were girls.

I disagree. We can’t wait for female feticide to stop before we make this world worth living for those who have not been killed in the womb. Every issue needs to be taken seriously.

Also, one of the reasons girl babies are killed is that many parents feel sexual crimes make it difficult to raise daughters. It frightens the parents that no matter what happens, the victim is likely to be blamed. These little girls, babies, young and old women didn’t dress like ‘sluts’.

The same article complains about Slut Walk protesting insensitivity in handling sexual crimes “while women are being burnt for dowry?”

Well, not only are all issues important but also sometimes they are connected.

Why don’t women just walk out of these marriages instead of being burnt alive?

Because they fear living alone.

Why do they fear living alone?

Same sexual harassment. And same excuses for the criminals. Many like Sweety choose to die pure and honorable.

Why is it so easy for a woman to be unsafe? And a rapist to be safe?

Another objection by media, Slut Walk is frivolous because, ‘women are being murdered in honour killings”

Slut Walk is Khap Panchayat’s night mare. It conveys, women do not need to fit into everybody’s ideas of what is honorable.

Also the rural women who roll bidis for Rs 30 a day, face the same risk of being called sluts  and there are  words in Indian languages that convey the same.

Since the protest aims to create better sensitization towards sexual crimes, the dalit women in remotest parts of Indian would also benefit from it.

A recent global survey  found India to be the fourth most dangerous place in the world for women.

And why is India so dangerous for women? One of the reasons is misguided actions. Instead of focusing on the crime and real issues,  the media and the law enforcers focus on how women must protest.

I feel every step in the right direction should be welcomed and supported.

Related Posts:

Chandni – Yes means yes, no means no – The Slut walk

Indian Homemaker- Those charged with our safety should have a true understanding of what it is to be a survivor of sexual assault — slut or otherwise.

One rapist let off with a few slaps, another rapist allowed to kill for family honor.

A five-year-old student of Class 1 was raped by her 19-year-old cousin.

The girl’s mother said the child was lured by her cousin, Om Pal Giri, to an isolated plot near her house. “When I went looking for her, I saw Om Pal sexually assaulting her. He ran away after I hurled a brick at him,” she said. The family elders reached a compromise and “slapped the man in front of our relatives and allowed him to leave”, said father Mangu Giri.

The girl’s condition deteriorated in school. “We took her to a local doctor. She died by the time we reached district hospital,” her father said.

Ghaziabad Police circle officer Kapil Dev Singh said the family didn’t inform the doctor about the rape. Mangu said, “We didn’t tell anybody as the matter was settled between the families.” [From here]

(Thanks for the link J)

We don’t take women’s lives, and any crimes against women, specially sexual crimes, seriously. 

Except when women are suspected to be willing partners. 

In Rohtak, Haryana, a 23 year old rapist, out on parole, killed a neighbour over allegations that she was having an affair with his aunt. A crowd of 7000 people collected, nobody called the police, nobody interfered.

When the widowed mother of an 8 year old girl died, the convicted rapist rushed to the house of his 35-year-old aunt Shakuntala, dragged her out and started beating her mercilessly.

Naresh Kumar, the rapist then went to the police and surrendered, saying he had killed the two women to save his family’s honour. [Click here to read more.]

In one case villagers let a convicted rapist talk about honor and in another he was let off with a few slaps. 

The first comment below the first article reads – “The parents must be charged for abetting and hiding a criminal offence.”

Then should the village heads in the second case also be charged with abetting and hiding a crime?

What about the rapists? Should they be, along with jail terms – not given some information about why they are in jail?

It doesn’t look like the villagers or the families,or even the police realise that rape is a crime.

A visibly shaken Shiney Ahuja gets seven years for raping his maid despite her ‘admitting’ the charges were false.

News reporting continues to be sympathetic to the rapist.

“As the judges read out the sentence, a visibly shaken Shiney Ahuja broke down in the court.”

“…Ahuja’s maid had told the court that the actor never raped her. She admitted slapping false charged on the actor…”

The maid ‘admitted‘? What does ‘admitted ‘ mean?
Confess, own up, come clean, acknowledge, disclose, divulge. Is that what she did?
“The court, however, decided that she had turned a hostile witness.”

No mention in this report of why the court decided this.

The same tone continues in the following report.where the judge ‘felt’ the victim had given false evidence? No mention of abrasions on his forearm or the forensic reports that made the judge ‘feel’ this way?
The ‘judge found/decided/came to the conclusion” would have been more accurate?

“The court has also not accepted the maid’s evidence in the court that she was not raped as the judge felt that she had given false evidence.
Clad in pink shirt and jeans, 38 year old Shiney Ahuja was accompanied by his wife Anupam in the court when the judgment was delivered.
According to the policemen there were tears in his eyes when the judge pronounced the order…”

His wife accompanied him. Would she do that if he was a rapist? Could he be an innocent family man with ‘tears in his eyes’?

“While convicting the accused, Judge P M Chouhan relied mainly upon the FIR in the case, Shiney’s lawyer Srikant Shivade told reporters who were not allowed in the court as the trial was in-camera.”

Did the judge mainly rely upon the FIR?

The Hindustan Times explained it wasn’t just the FIR or how the judge ‘felt’ that led to the conviction,

“…the domestic help had turned hostile. But the medical report and DNA finger printing report suggested otherwise.
Both reports suggested an intercourse between the domestic help and Ahuja.
‘The court had primarily taken into consideration the DNA finger printing and medical reports which tested positive,’ said public prosecuter Kashinath Digge.”

Indian Express report was also unbiased,

“The accused’s conduct, the medical report which supported the prosecution’s claim that the girl suffered a hymen tear, and the DNA evidence were strongly relied upon. The accused is found guilty under Section 376 (rape) of the Indian Penal Code

The victim’s complaint was supported by the medical evidence collected from the spot. “There were bloodstains in Ahuja’s room. The quilt and curtains showed traces of semen. Ahuja’s hands had abrasions,” said Public Prosecutor K V Dighe.

Shouldn’t this have been mentioned instead of describing his tearful eyes?

Note: Writing this post from an IPhone I am not used to, will link the reports and spell check as soon as possible. also this post is a continuation of the discussion in the last post.