A light hearted take on the way future is dear to the girls and present to the boys?

What do you think makes boys ki life easy?

Not taking seriously a girl friend’s ‘visibly unhappy’ discomfort with their relationship is a ‘boy thing’?

How does this getting away with non-seriousness make a boy’s life easier?

How does being uncommitted in a relationship with a partner who hopes for commitment make anybody’s life easier?

Take a look at this ‘a light hearted take on the way future is dear to the girls and present to the boys.

If you can’t see the video:

The ad film features Ranbir Kapoor picking up his visibly unhappy girlfriend and setting off on his Hero Maestro. She is tense about their future and tells Ranbir that she is not comfortable. He playfully shifts the conversation to his scooter and says the seats are indeed quite comfortable. Annoyed, the girl tells him that she’s serious, and asks for how long will this go on, referring to their relationship status. Ranbir again answers with reference to the Maestro, saying it will go far, with its ‘superb mileage’. …

When they stop, she tells him, “Just look at you. Kabhi toh serious ho jao (Get serious).” He straightens a rolled up denim leg and says with a serious face, “Marry me.” Asked if he is serious, he nods a ‘yes’ before ceding that he isn’t. She smiles at his antics and the two head into the event they have come to attend.The voice over concludes by saying “Boys ki life and Maestro ki ride; easy hai” (Boys’ life and Maestro’s ride; it’s easy).A super accompanies the voice over to sign off saying, ‘Maestro. Such a boy thing’.

Sanjay Tandon, COO, Draftfcb-Ulka, Delhi, explained that the Maestro is a brand built around boyish idiosyncrasies, and said, “To further reinforce the positioning success of the brand, Ranbir exudes his boyish charm through a typical ‘Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus.’ storyline.” [Hero Maestro rides ‘a boy’s life’ with Ranbir Kapoor]

Related Posts:

Irresponsible girls who throw away their lives while in throes of lust for the completely wrong person…

Ek Hindustani ladki ki Izzat.

“A clandestine, and irresponsible, affair may prove dangerous. A city girl learnt it the hard way,”

“I need suggestions – these girls are ruining their lives with their stupid ideas about love.”

How important is it for a girl to Get Married and Stay Married?

“My relation with my ex was dead because he was never available for me in person or over phone.”

“The relatives seemed to be offering ‘condolences’ to my mother, for having the misfortune of having an ‘unmarried’ daughter…”

My guy told me that he is not willing to disappoint his parents.

Jealousies and one-upmanship are sometimes seen as machismo.

“One of the so-called best professor of my department … advices his students (girls) that men can be satisfied only by two things…”

When Getting Married and Staying Married is not an Indian woman’s life purpose.

“The sense of entitlement that’s hard-wired into every male child in an Indian household”

“This man is openly threatening his daughter and is instigating others to burn alive their daughters.”

Weird, funny facts about Misogynists.

This encourages double standards.

An email: An Old fashioned boy friend and a Liberal girl friend.

“I am betraying my parents, country and culture by not having an arranged marriage, people are talking, younger sisters not getting married.”

Where is the opportunity for Indian men to learn the most natural thing in the world – finding a mate??

“Why didn’t these women find life partners by dating?”

Live in Relationships: The man gets a temporary disposable wife?

What did Sharad Yadav mean by, ‘Who amongst us has not followed girls?’

Teaching school children that getting married without a bad name is a dream of every young girl.

Have your parents ever received a complaint about your morals, life style or personal choices…?

Marriages are sold to Indian women in a glossy cover…?

Boy friends are new parents

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Patriarchal stereotypes and Human Brain Analysis – Men vs. Women…

Sarkywoman shared, ‘MUST READ: Interesting Facts about Men and Women‘. Not sure where it originated, but a lot of people seem to feel that these are ‘General Facts’. Please note how it is all made to sound scientific and well researched.

Human Brain Analysis – Men vs. Women…

1. MULTI-TASKING
Women – Multiple process
Womens brains designed to concentrate multiple task at a time.
Women can Watch a TV and Talk over phone and cook.
Men – Single Process
Mens brains designed to concentrate only one work at a time. Men can not watch TV and talk over the phone at the same time. they stop the TV while Talking. They can either watch TV or talk over the phone or cook.

IHM: Patriarchal gender stereotypes being presented as scientific facts. Star Plus anthem propagated the same stereotype.

2. LANGUAGE
Women can easily learn many languages. But can not find solutions to problems. Men can not easily learn languages, they can easily solve problems. That’s why in average a 3 years old girl has three times higher vocabulary than a 3 years old boy.

IHM:  Patriarchy would not have survived so long if this was true.

Most religious texts and their powerfully argued misogyny; most of history (almost totally refusing to acknowledge women’s existence); and frequently poetry that taught women to see romance in dependence and sexual inexperience were (many still are) written by men (and some women) who had mastered the art of using language(s) for communication.

3. ANALYTICAL SKILLS
Mens brains has a lot of space for handling the analytical process… If a complex map is viewed by women, they can not understand it. … For them it is just a dump of lines on a paper.

IHM: Reminds me of this:

“WOMEN love self-sacrifice
Suffering and good advice;
If they don’t love these sincerely
Then they’re not true women really.” [Alice Duer Miller]

Or this.

WOMEN S SPHERE 

If They Meant All They Said 

CHARM is a woman s strongest arm; 
My charwoman is full of charm; 
I chose her, not for strength of arm 
But for her strange elusive charm. 

And how tears heighten woman s powers! 
My typist weeps for hours and hours: 
I took her for her weeping powers 
They so delight my business hours. 

A woman lives by intuition. 
Though my accountant shuns addition 
She has the rarest intuition. 
(And I myself can do addition.) 

Timidity in girls is nice. 
My cook is so afraid of mice. 
Now you ll admit it s very nice 
To feel your cook s afraid of mice.[Alice Duer Miller]

4. CAR DRIVING.
While driving a car, mans analytical spaces are used in his brain. He can drive a car fastly. If he sees an object at long distance, immediately his brain classifies the object (bus or van or car) direction and speed of the object and he drives accordingly. Where woman take a long time to recognize the object direction/ speed. Mans single process mind stops the audio in the car (if any), then concentrates only on driving.

IHM: So we know why women are not allowed to drive in Saudi Arabia.

Also, the underlined part directly contradicts the underlined part in point 1.

5. LYING
When men lie to women face to face, they get caught easily. Womans super natural brain observes facial expression 70%, body language 20% and words coming from the mouth 10%. Mens brain does not have this. Women easily lie to men face to face.
So guys, do not lie face to face.

IHM: Please note women can’t analyze or read maps with these ‘super natural brains’ that observe 10% ‘words coming out of mouth’.

6. PROBLEMS SOLVING
If a man have a lot of problems, his brain clearly classifies the problems and puts them in individual rooms in the brain and then finds the solution one by one. You can see many guys looking at the sky for a long time. If a woman has a lot of problems, her brain can not classify the problems. she wants some one to hear that. After telling everything to a person she goes happily to bed. She does not worry about the problems being solved or not.

IHM: Another attempt to reinforce a stereotype. Fact is men need to communicate as much as non-men.

7. WHAT THEY WANT
Men want status, success, solutions, big process, etc… But Women want relationship, friends, family, etc…

IHM: Patriarchy favors financially successful men. And Patriarchy expects women to see their husband’s extended family, father’s neighbours (before marriage), husband’s neighbours’ aunts’ third cousins (after marriage) etc as their world (ghar sansaar). A disinclination to devote their lives to getting along with the above mentioned is disapproved of. Also, the relationships women are permitted are controlled by the patriarchal role they are playing.

Such ‘scientific studies’ put further pressure on individuals to fit into stereotypes.

8. UNHAPPINESS
If women are unhappy with their relations, they can not concentrate on their work. If men are unhappy with their work, they can not concentrate on the relations.

IHM:

In general men in patriarchal societies are not allowed relationships unless they can ‘provide for’ these partners. (The partners are kept dependent by deeming the work demanded of them as unpaid labour)

Women’s existence as individuals is often not even acknowledged, they are seen as wives, sisters, mothers of men.

‘In his 2013 State of the Union address, President Obama said: “We know our economy is stronger when our wives, mothers, and daughters can live their lives free from discrimination …”

Defining women by their relationships to other people is reductive, misogynist, and alienating to women who do not define ourselves exclusively by our relationships to others. Further, by referring to “our” wives et al, the President appears to be talking to The Men of America about Their Women, rather than talking to men AND women.’ [Link]

9. SPEECH
Women use indirect language in speech. But Men use direct language.

IHM: This is not true even though, in some patriarchal societies women must not be heard at all, specially by men and elders. Women are raised with rigid guidelines to get along and be tactful (i.e. Relationships). Good girls are described in various patriarchal societies as sweet, soft spoken, tactful, respectful, ‘good natured’, ‘ever smiling’ etc. Women who don’t follow these rules are accused of being disrespectful, difficult, provocative, deserving of well timed slaps by their husbands (and  other family elders), shameless, behaya etc.

Men are encouraged to be aggressive achievers, respectful and decent only towards those more powerful. Polite behavior and decency extended by men towards ‘deserving and respectful ladies’ is seen as an exception/favor. Since it’s not seen as the norm, it even has a name – ‘chivalry’.

10. HANDLING EMOTION
Women talk a lot without thinking. Men act a lot without thinking.

IHM: So nobody thinks. Some people talk, some people act. 🙄

An email: “I picked up the hot chimta that I was using to roast chappaties and told him…”

Sharing an email from Ek Hindustani Ladki in response to the previous post – How old were you when you first noticed any gender bias anywhere…?

Dear IHM,

I knew when I was about 7 or 8 years old that there was discrimination, sensed that it was wrong, but I didn’t have the courage to oppose it… Instead I swore to myself that when I have children, it would be different. I swore I would not do the things or say the things I saw some elders say or do with girls.

The first time I spoke up, I was about 16.

I questioned an elder in our family, when he joked about how a man beat his wife and his neighbours intervened and warned the husband not to ever beat his wife again or they would beat him to pulp.

This elder said, and I am translating, “What has the world come to, if a husband can’t beat his wife, then who else can?

This made me angry (and I am not easily provoked) – such obvious lack of respect for the victim, because she was a woman! I told him, “The man was lucky he wasn’t my husband cause if he was, I would have poisoned him the first time he beat me.

He said I was a girl, I couldn’t do such things, I assured him I meant what I said. Also, that I wouldn’t marry a man who thinks beating his wife was acceptable. This respectable, elderly relative told my parents to marry me off before I finished college and got out of hand. I smirked at him, I knew I was not going to allow that to happen.

I did get a scolding from my parents for showing “disrespect” to an ‘elder’. I never touched his feet after that episode. My mother said I was being a disobedient and arrogant daughter, she thought it was good to take elders’ blessings (by touching their feet). I told her, he might bless me with thoughts like, “I hope her husband beats her.” This made my mom laugh. Then, I told my mother that she did know I was right so at least when she talks to me, she shouldn’t act like she cares about this person.

This was an ongoing drama, I avoided being around him as much as possible – I couldn’t tolerate his presence.

Another elder was an Uncle who I saw make my aunt’s life miserable.

One day, when I was about 18, I was at their place and he started his usual pushing and shoving. I picked up the hot chimta (spatula) that I was using to roast chappaties and told him, unless he wants me to brand him like a buffalo that he was, he better back off. Yep, got blasted for that too… my parents told me that I was too young (hah!) to interfere in my aunt’s marriage and that it was between them… I told them I didn’t regret saying what I said and I would do the same if he gave me a sliver of a chance.

Later the families intervened because my mother and my other aunt and uncles refused to let this aunt of mine suffer…They had a meeting with this uncle’s family and then things sort of cooled, there wasn’t any more pushing or shoving but they didn’t want them to divorce. I don’t think my aunt ever had any idea that there were better options, better men out there… but I guess that is her choice… I still keep in touch with her.

It all seems petty now but it still riles me when I see these men. For all my forgiving nature, I find myself being very unforgiving of particular trespasses. On the other hand, I realize that there are things I did, said and thought as a newly married bride that went against my own principles. I craved the acceptance of my husband’s family. Now I know better. It took me many of years to think differently, to unlearn the conditioning, to feel less guilt. To be more accepting of myself, and not make myself into what others expected out of me.

I am not all there yet, but will definitely get there.

Ek Hindustani Ladki.

So, Ek Hindustani ladki ko gussa kyon aata hai?

EDITED TO ADD: What would you have done if you were in place of Ek Hindustani Ladki? Have you ever been in similar situations?

How old were you when you first noticed any gender bias anywhere…?

Was it against yourself or somebody else? How old were you?

What were your first reactions? Did you think along the lines of, “This is the way it is.” Or did you think, “But this is wrong.“?

If it was against yourself, were you glad you weren’t born a girl/boy?

Did you ever voice your opinion – how old were you when you did that, how was it taken?

Were you ever able to make someone think again, or actually change somebody’s mind? Were you ever told you were too idealistic or ‘too radical’?

 

 

 

Twenty five reasons women are given to like being women.

Every International Women’s Day, messages and forwards give women reasons why they should be glad they were born women. I  googled and found these common ones. Many of the reasons have to do with how women look and dress, and with how much they can give up.

Not linking and no offense is intended to anybody.

Updated to addMany of the points of view I have disagreed with came from this post. I understand that sometimes we have points of views that are not the same and I hope this post is seen as only a discussion, the idea is not to hurt or offend.

I just want to discuss, why is it felt that women need reasons to like or be proud of being women? If these reasons were not there then would they not like being themselves?
Also, is it felt that they would have liked it less or more if they were men?

Which ones of these would you say should make women glad to be women?

1.  Women can carry a life within themselves. Or women ‘have a special gift of motherhood’.

If a woman can’t or doesn’t want to be a mother, should she stop being proud of being a woman?

There’s so much talk of motherhood – one hears very little (almost nothing) about accepting that motherhood does change women’s bodies but women are to expected to look like they did not carry a life within themselves.  Looking like ‘do bachchon ki amma‘ is not really seen as a compliment.

Also makes it look like parenting as fathers is a less joyful experience.

[If you are not reading this at (https://indianhomemaker.wordpress.com/), then you are reading stolen content. The owner of the site you are on has stolen this article and is making money by you reading it. If this article interests you, please go to (https://indianhomemaker.wordpress.com/) to read it on its original site and do not return to this one. Thank you.]

2.   Women have the power to turn heads wherever they go, even the ugliest!

i. Even the ugliest? Stresses on how women are classified by their looks, ugly, pretty, plain, hot, dowdy etc. Objectifies them.

ii. Why is managing to turn heads seen as a power? (Does it empower women, unless that’s what they do for a living etc.)

iii. This becomes the biggest reason for women not being able to step out of their homes in many parts of the world, also becomes an excuse to protect and restrict.

3.   Women can wear prettier clothes! Salwar kurta, skirts, sari, lehenga, gowns and trousers.

In India mostly they can only wear what they are permitted to wear – modesty, fashion or the need to fit-in, take precedence over comfort and practicality.

4.  Women can wear pants, men can’t wear skirts.

Maybe because men don’t need to. Men’s clothing is more evolved, generally more practical – weather appropriate, easier movements, roomier pockets, comfortable shoes, less embellishment to take care of.

Skirts, saris, corsets, dupattas and high heels seem to be preferred for looking a certain way (feminine, ladylike, trendy etc) than for comfort.

5. Little girls can get away with mischief, boys get blamed. (As in, girls break a window pane, boys get blamed)

Three points:

i. How was good girls and bad boys stereotype created? Many Indian girls are not allowed to play games that would make them get darker, or take them away from helping their mothers with housework.

ii. Too high a cost to pay for being seen as innocent when one is not. Bad ethics too.

iii. ‘Boys will be boys’ eventually works to confuse boys and later men, by conveying that they may do as they please, because they can’t help it.

6.   Where there is a cleavage there is a way.

Cleavage as a shortcut? There is a possibility of other cleavages around, leading to competition and then it won’t remain a shortcut. There is also the risk of the other party not keeping their end of the generally unwritten bargain. Unwritten bargains can lead to exploitative situations.

Also unethical, because those who are better qualified may not have a cleavage.

7.  Girl Talk.

Sounds like women do have the social advantage here, but men do have friends and men talk too…

8. I like being a girl because all I have to do is swish my hips, flip my hair and pout and lo I am entertained by buffoons (men).

If the attention is offensive then it should not be in this list. And this could change when there are enough women in public spaces, freely moving about their daily lives, interacting with men.

If the attention was inoffensive, why call them buffoons?

9.  A pretty smile can make us move ahead in supermarket queues and get unknown men to carry our groceries. Gal power!

I think being able to smile for small favors might work for men, women, senior citizens and children, anybody who is seen as charming.

10. Looking good is a gal’s right. /I love that we as women, are the beautiful sex.

Are women really better looking than men? Thin women or fat women; fair women, dark women; tall women or short women? If they are, then how does it improve the quality of lives they live? Does the need to look good restrict their lives and choices in some ways, how they eat, sleep, dress, move, have fun, marry, socialize etc?

11. Only women can wear high heels!

This is like saying only little girls in China had their feet bound, or only men can shave. Not healthy, restricts movement. Wearing should be a free choice, not an expectation.

12. Roomy bags!

Very convenient no doubt. But men do have pockets and brief cases.

13.  I can always go up to men in a bus, sitting in the so called “ladies seats” and pull them out, but they cannot do the same to me even if I am sitting in the non-ladies seat which must be the “men’s seat”.

Would it not have been more fun to be a woman if women could sit on any vacant seat like everybody else, without fearing sexual harassment?

14.  God created chocolate to soothe the female taste bud.

Chocolates can be enjoyed even as men and children.

15.  Gals can cuddle a kitten/teddy bear without being commented upon.

Kitten or a soft toy should be fine to hug by anybody, but it’s true that women are more able to express certain kinds of feelings, like sadness, insecurity, happiness in a restrained manner, affection (within limits) etc.

16.  Women can afford to cry in public letting out the pent up feelings, men can’t!

Sadly this is true, but thankfully this is changing.

17.  Gold is a woman’s toy.

Gold is a good investment but real estate which has traditionally been men’s investment seems to provide excellent returns, is more difficult to steal and also becomes a shelter. Many women who have plenty of gold do not have a house of their own.

18.  I being a girl have the power to melt the toughest and the strongest willed men and give them goose bumps and sleepless nights.

Not true. How do we see violent crimes against girls then?

19.  Girls will always be daddy’s li’l princess at no matter what age.

Doesn’t apply to a huge number of girls. Some are not lil princesses and some are not even allowed to be born, some are killed, neglected, abused etc

20. Weddings are fun for women – clothes, jewelry, attention!  Men are just props.

There was a time one needed weddings as an excuse to feast, shop, dress and celebrate, today it has become a reason for so much misery.

One can have parties and functions anytime, with the amount of money that is spent on weddings, massive events can be organised and enjoyed without the organizers (brides parents) being forced to take loans etc.

In India bridegrooms receive gifts, cars, cash, dowry, attention, ‘importance’ – how are they mere props? They even have more say than the bride in who they are marrying.

21.  I can live through countless hormone changes, blink back my tears and still manage to smile to make my loved ones happy.

I hope if hormone changes are causing problems, then solutions are sought, support is got and tears are not blinked away too often.

And if there is a real reason to cry then  it is not pretended away as ‘hormonal changes’.

22. I am born to multitask.

Multitasking has no gender. It’s only good if it helps you live a better quality of life, it’s unfortunate if it makes you take on more than you can handle.

23.  I am the epitome of care, affection and sacrifice: a woman.

That’s a generalization and an unfair expectation.

It’s possible for both men and women to be caring, and if a woman is not an epitome of care and sacrifice, she is still a woman.

24. Women are generally not under pressure to be aggressive, and to prove they are physically stronger than anybody else around.

Men are under social pressure to act aggressive and to prove their physical strength, also to sometimes show they know better than other men. They can hurt themselves – even seriously harm themselves trying to do this.

25. Women have the power to save the family, tradition, society and culture.

And they are honor killed or honor-forced to sacrifice and save all of the above.

What other reasons have you seen women being given to like being women?

Women will be women, even empowerment did not turn them into Bhartiya Nari or Goddesses.

Women’s Empowerment spoiling society: Bangalore HC judge

– Photograph and information shared by Mr G Vishvanath from Bangalore

“Society is being spoilt because of women’s empowerment and ego problems,” an angry judge told the advocate of a woman who accepts alimony from her former husband, but refused him the right to visit their daughter.

Division bench comprising Justice K L Manjunath and Justice K Govindarajulu were hearing an appeal by Binu Vineet seeking visitation rights to see his minor daughter whom he has not seen for seven years and who lives with his former wife, Shiny. [Link]


Three points.

1.  Women are (have always been!!) just as capable of selfishness, adultery, smoking, drinking, driving rashly, murder, exploitation, feeling pain or anger and wanting happiness as everybody else. The problem is that generally women are not seen as people, it’s almost like women were a different species that is kinder, weaker and more emotional. 🙄

Fact: Women are not goddesses or witches, they are human.

2. Acknowledgment that everybody is equal in the eyes of the law is empowering no doubt. But undoing centuries of wrong is not a favor to women and their loved ones, and it benefits the entire society.

It is unrealistic and immature to expect all the women (as if they were one unit) to ‘pay back’ for this ’empowerment’ by proving they ‘deserved’ it.

In a civilized society fair treatment and equality are the rights of all citizens – they don’t have to earn this right. For example, even the most hated Azmal Kasab deserved and is being given a fair trial, it’s a favor to the entire society, so the rest of us know we cannot some day be arrested, declared terrorists and hanged – without a fair trial. Or declared un-manly/un-womanly and stigmatized for just being ourselves.

3. By empowering women we empower men and children too.

For example, in a gender-stereotypes-free-society it would also not be assumed that all men are naturally prone to sexual crimes; (which means we acknowledge that we need to take charge of the small percent who do).

Not expecting people to fit into gender-stereotypes benefits both men and women and the entire society.

Note: Wanted to call this post – ‘Is the pious Bhartiya Nari turning into a Churail because of western ideas of women’s empowerment?’

Badges for My Sins Against Gender Stereotypes :)

Suranga emailed me these gorgeous badges – please feel free to add these badges to your side bar if you have picked the tag and saved yourself from twelve years of wrong colours and gifts 😉

A Pink Badge for men 🙂

A Blue Badge for women 🙂

Please link the lists of your Sins Against Gender Stereotypes to this post, so that I can send packets of chocolates in glossy pink wrappers for men, and TV remotes and beer mugs in Navy blue wrappers for women :mrgreen: …in case you have neglected to tag twelve friends 😈

NOTE: How would it be if there were special badges for best three female and best  three male winners?

With thanks to Hitchwriter 🙂

And now thanks to PNA – we have a  Facebook group called : Sinners Against Gender Stereotypes (SAGS)

Join and share the link to your SAGS post with other sinners 🙂

An Unedited Online Chat

Friend from class XI & XII says:

Hi

Friend from class XI & XII says:

What’s up?

IHM says:

Hi

IHM says:

how are you?

Friend from class XI & XII says:

How was Diwali?

IHM says:

ok ok

Friend from class XI & XII says:

I’m good

IHM says:

how was yours?

Friend from class XI & XII says:

beautiful rangoli you made

Friend from class XI & XII says:

v good

IHM says:

Daughter not me

IHM says:

loves making rangoli

Friend from class XI & XII says:

hmmmmn ….daughters!!!!

IHM says:

that’s about the only daughterly thing she does

Friend from class XI & XII says:

boyz were least bothered

IHM says:

ya?

Friend from class XI & XII says:

Son #2 of course put up the lights

Friend from class XI & XII says:

he’s handy around the house that way

IHM says:

Daughter helped with that too….she is the handy-girl

IHM says:

it’s not sons or daughter, just a matter of interest

Friend from class XI & XII says:

Gender does make a difference!!!!

IHM says:

Like how?

Friend from class XI & XII says:

And why not………..i don’t find anything strange in that

IHM says:

Not strange just untrue

Friend from class XI & XII says:

Ha….here you go again

IHM says:

I love to do a lot of stereotypically considered manly things

IHM says:

Love to watch the car being serviced!! Taking pictures, gadgets, gym, … love dogs- all manly things

IHM says:

I LOVE discussions and debates

You have just sent a nudge.

IHM says:

Did you like my blog?

Friend from class XI & XII says:

i don’t care much about discussing ……….

IHM says:

so you are more feminine

Friend from class XI & XII says:

i think its boring….i mean its not that that i’m very rigid about my ideas

Friend from class XI & XII says:

i mean they just fluctuate with issues and situations

Friend from class XI & XII says:

when i say, i miss having a daughter. i just feel maybe …..

Friend from class XI & XII says:

things would be better if there was another girl in the house

IHM says:

no I can imagine that

Friend from class XI & XII says:

now i don’t mean things are bad……..just different

IHM says:

but they are no different. Kids are just kids

IHM says:

Tho’ it’s like having a best friend at home

Friend from class XI & XII says:

Maybe she would’ve been interested in rangolis, decorations, cooking, in other finer skills……….

Friend from class XI & XII says:

but i know she maynot ……..then it may have been difficult to handle….

IHM says:

she likes cooking, but Son baked a chocolate cake for Diwali, he hates Indian sweets

Friend from class XI & XII says:

Son #1 is an excellent cook………..

Friend from class XI & XII says:

Son # 2 makes pop corn; mine never turn out like his

IHM says:

That is what I mean

IHM says:

why bind them in manmade rules, let them grow and be creative, whatever their interests

Friend from class XI & XII says:

of course…..who’s stopping them or denying that

IHM says:

I know you won’t do that, I feel you say this ‘daughters are like that’ thing just like that,

Friend from class XI & XII says:

Still the basic difference between the genders can’t be denied

IHM says:

of course they are different but there are no stereotypes

Friend from class XI & XII says:

…..so we are saying the same things………….only in different words

IHM says:

As a kid I used to fight with mum if someone said ‘your daughters have grown up now they should help you in the kitchen’ in a patronising tone, we never let her force us to learn to cook, you remember how I was…

Friend from class XI & XII says:

I know what you mean but I also remember you saying that you wish your mom had made you learn cooking

Friend from class XI & XII says:

So………it’s not about the skills you learn or don’t

IHM says:

Yeah but today I can say with pride that she was right in not forcing even in those days

Friend from class XI & XII says:

I think its momentary feelings

IHM says:

All kids should help all parents. No given rigid roles…skills are good, one should be encouraged to learn but NOT because one is a boy or a girl.

Friend from class XI & XII says:

phew….yes ma’m. I AGREE

IHM says:

LOL

IHM says:

🙂

Friend from class XI & XII says:

i like your vehemence about these issues

IHM says:

Okay tell me what you think of my blog

Friend from class XI & XII says:

i read it in a glance………..like impatiently…..but whatever i could make of it, i think it was excellent

Friend from class XI & XII says:

now i will read it with more interest and patience

IHM says:

I am going to add this conversation minus our names…

Friend from class XI & XII says:

OH…….really.GREAT

Friend from class XI & XII says:

send me the link again

IHM says:

okaaaa

Friend from class XI & XII says:

LINK???? send me again

IHM says:

http://lifeofanindianhomemaker.blogspot.com/

Friend from class XI & XII says:

i read this one, threat revenge one, so she is in Texas?

IHM says:

ya

Friend from class XI & XII says:

it gives you a chance to voice your opinion and maybe make …give a different perspective

Friend from class XI & XII says:

Double standards

Friend from class XI & XII says:

I know that the actual RSS workers are the real social activists

Friend from class XI & XII says:

i have see them in my family

IHM says:

but

Friend from class XI & XII says:

I even heard them saying that with time, things have changed, now its only the greed for power and popularity is what is driving them

IHM says:

and now affron terrorism

IHM says:

saffron

Friend from class XI & XII says:

they are not what the original RSS used to be

Friend from class XI & XII says:

chalo bye for now

IHM says:

ya

Friend from class XI & XII says:

yeah………and much more and in the most hideous way

IHM says:

can you imagine rioting first, then now planting bombs

Friend from class XI & XII says:

actualy its so disgusting………

IHM says:

yes.

Friend from class XI & XII says:

all this politics

IHM says:

more for someone who has seen how they were earlier

Friend from class XI & XII says:

well….just a tip of the iceberg

Friend from class XI & XII says:

its terrible

IHM says:

okay bye..they are all clamouring for attention here, the kids, the dogs everyone!!

Friend from class XI & XII says:

i can’t imagine how or why the Centre is quiet???

Friend from class XI & XII says:

chalo bye for now

IHM says:

bye