Sharing an anonymous email.
“I even asked my husband if he was maybe gay, in which case I just won’t tell anyone about it…”
Dear IHM,
I’m in a very unhappy state and so confused with what to do..
I have been married for 7 years (known my husband 2 years before that when we “dated”)… while we were dating, nothing sexual happened between us (not even a kiss, no heart racing stuff)… while I didn’t give it much thought then, now I feel I should have!
Even after marriage, he shows absolutely zero interest in me. It’s been SEVEN years and through these years, I have fought, cried, reasoned out, explained myself, allowed him to be the way he wants… basically everything that I could do.
I have told him openly I miss the “sex”, not as a physical activity but more as an emotional one.
I have told him I’m okay with doing anything and that he needs to feel comfortable and rest assured I won’t judge him incase he has weird tastes (I was thinking “fetish” or “role play”).
I even asked him if he was maybe gay, in which case I just won’t tell anyone about it, we would work on the pregnancy thing through alternatives.
But he just doesn’t give me the input I need. There is zero cooperation from his side.
He keeps saying there is no problem (evidently there is!)… and he says “we will do this week”, “we will have sex next week” etc
And SEVEN years have passed already.
I’m am at an extremely depressed stage. I do not know what to do.
I cry randomly, I feel sad… and I’m crying as I type this.
I’m scared that I’m getting into depression without me even realising it!
And I feel so worthless through it all. I feel like there is no one really for me (my parents are no more) and many a times I have thought about divorce.
Few things…
1. 98% he’s not gay (saw some porn details on his mobile history. Regular porn, no fetish types or gay types)
2. I’m extremely hygienic and smell good
3. Our environment is sex friendly
4. I’m a good looker and quite attractive (not to sound vain, but wanted to clear certain basic questions that might pop up)
Can you PLEASE do a topic on this, I feel like I need to see things from a fresher perspective..
Thanks a ton!
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