Why does the Delhi bus rapist blame his victim in prison interview?

 

“A girl is far more responsible for rape than a boy.” 

This rapist has no reason to disagree with many others, including women, who hold the same view.

He comes from a society that believes that the only way to control sexual crimes is by shaming, silencing and locking up the victims.

It’s possible that he has no idea that ‘sex without consent’ is rape. He probably views rape as a punishment for women who don’t know their place.

Do you know of any efforts to inform him otherwise?

Delhi bus rapist blames his victim in prison interview

You can’t clap with one hand – it takes two hands,” he says in the interview. “A decent girl won’t roam around at 9 o’clock at night. A girl is far more responsible for rape than a boy. Boy and girl are not equal. Housework and housekeeping is for girls, not roaming in discos and bars at night doing wrong things, wearing wrong clothes. About 20 per cent of girls are good.”

[Such  views are common: The rapists often don’t see their actions as crimes, the police said, and don’t expect the victims to report them.]

Amongst many other men and women,

The lawyers who defended the gang in court express similarly extreme views about women who venture out at night. In a previous televised interview, lawyer AP Singh said: “If my daughter or sister engaged in pre-marital activities and disgraced herself and allowed herself to lose face and character by doing such things, I would most certainly take this sort of sister or daughter to my farmhouse, and in front of my entire family, I would put petrol on her and set her alight.” [This man openly threatened his daughter and instigated others to burn alive their daughters.]

 Related Posts:

What makes Men Rape? – Do read.

The rapists often don’t see their actions as crimes, the police said, and don’t expect the victims to report them.

“… people will say we encouraged these men to follow us… even though we are innocent”

“Sometimes it seems like every single thing I do has the potential to be something ‘provocative’.”

When they don’t even understand crime, how are they ever going to begin controlling it?

Can sexual harassment be compared to Terrorism against a whole community called women?

“Such mannequins will excite men and pose a danger to women.”

“I am safe because I’m very careful in the way I behave and dress in public, on the streets.”

In Gurgaon, jobs, safety and roads after 8 pm, reserved for men?

It’s Your Fault

Dad knifes girl for speaking to lover

Rape and clothing: How it’s all dressed up – A guest post by Praveen Talwar.

“She was warned several times and was used to unethical practices like friendship with boys.”

How did we make Indian criminals believe that they have 7 khoon maaf if they can claim to be teaching Indian women a lesson in Indian values?

Home most unsafe place for women : A unique court-ordered study by Delhi Police has revealed.

31 thoughts on “Why does the Delhi bus rapist blame his victim in prison interview?

    • True. Also like asking someone who was attacked by a rabid dog why they were walking on the road…nobody says that either.
      Everyone accepts that the car belongs to the car owner , not the thief.
      Everyone accepts that streets belong to humans,not dogs.
      But women? Women belong( are the property of) to men, families, communities, religion, society…every damn thing under the sun.. except themselves.

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    • Uh, no. There was no action here analogous to ‘leaving the car unlocked’. She didn’t ‘forget’ to do anything. She was just going about her daily life like everyone else. And, comparing women to objects is completely unnecessary.

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  1. How can you even attempt to uplift such minds? Really, I do not see this happening. I know of my own extended family members who would agree that women need to be shown their place and I know for sure they will never attempt to change their views. Best is to put these rapists in high security prison for the rest of their miserable lives. As for the deterrent effect, awareness and education is the only solution, slow as it might seem.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. 99% of India thinks same way . Same thinking exist even in IITs and IIMs. In college many times boys have argued that if she can talk or go out with boy X then why can’t she go with us. As if by talking with boy X she has became public property and has no control . She has to oblige every request of any boy. There is no concept that girl can have a choice and can exercise it.

    Deep down every male in India has sense of entitlement over women around them. This mentality is nourished by Indian value system and culture.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Seeing this attitude in colleges is highly disturbing.
      Misogyny in India transcends all barriers of age,caste, religion, social class, income group and even gender.

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    • Also, let’s say the majority don’t understand women’s consent and a woman’s right to her body. This in itself is responsible for so many crimes against women. But what about pain and torture? Isn’t this even more basic? The woman on the bus was not only gang raped (which in itself is intensely traumatic) but also subjected to unbearable levels of physical pain and suffering. Even the lawyer seems to be unaffected by the way pain was inflicted on her in a most treacherous way. But then, if burning his own daughter alive is something he can talk of so lightly, then we need to start wondering not just if our society understands consent but if they are even human or alive – to not have a reaction to excruciating pain that is deliberately inflicted and horrific levels of sadism.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Priya, the ideas of honor and shame also make it possible for such unimaginably horrific crimes to go unpunished, even unreported!
        The fact that somebody could say this so openly and probably know that he would find sympathy, says so much about our society.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. “Describing the killing as an “accident”, he said: “When being raped, she shouldn’t fight back. She should just be silent and allow the rape. Then they’d have dropped her off after ‘doing her’, and only hit the boy.”
    Completely & utterly lacking in any sort of remorse.
    So now the victim is not only responsible for her own rape but her murder too?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I seriously dont believe such people can be changed. Nope IMO not possible. lock them away and throw the key it’s not worth the trouble trying to understand this mindset.
    I have uncles who say girls shouldnt provoke boys to tease. Girls tasks etc., quite regressive. i Used to argue and try to make sense, But i stopped a decade ago, I tell them to mind their own business if they comment on me and i spent the time teaching my son and daughter about self, rights and behavior I told my daughter to stand up to them and tell them to keep quiet if they say something to her, i would back her up and it does not constitute disrespect, its just ignoring the ignorant and I do just as i please.
    They have now lunderstood that i dont really care for their opinion and thoughts and my 9yr old and her cousins think they are irrational too🙂
    their DIL’s all smile when i do it and have taken to ignoring them.
    So yes they haven’t changed their views, we haven’t tried to get them to see our point, but they have stopped commenting since they feel we insult their opinion,Nowadays its a non-issue, any womens rights girls vs boys tasks etc., they keep quiet , win-win for both sides.
    Its worth my time educating the next generation i really dont care to waste my time with the 60+ crown if 60 yrs on this earth haven’t taught them this, i doubt i can. and why bother, they are the past, its the future we should worry about.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. All those who blame the victim are potential rapists themselves. This MF proved that. In fact he also showed that rapists don’t feel pity or remorse or fear. They use their penis as the power of dominance and not for sex. Unless the society get that principle more female foetuses will get aborted and more women will be stopped from going out.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. After doing what he did, I am not in the least bit surprised by his response. Anyone who can do such things is obviously subhuman and a damaged psychopath.

    But the fact is that his views are echoed by so many “normal” people in India – fathers, mothers, uncles. Also, they separate the violence from rape – as if sexual assault is not violence. “Beating and torturing is bad; but rape is okay”. And compounded with ” beating and torturing someone who resists rape is okay.” Why is this?

    Is it because they consider women genetically inferior to men and therefore not eligible for rights?

    Is it because they don’t understand the difference between consensual sex and rape?

    Is it because they don’t see the inherent violence in forcing someone to perform a sexual act ?

    Why are we as Indians so dead to the suffering and pain of others?Why do we INSIST on justifying violence with hollow excuses like gender roles and the westernization argument.

    To this day, every time I think of this incident, I (like many other people) can’t stop crying. Why should anyone have to go through so much pain? Why do her loved ones have to live with the memory of such horror? And the worst part – Nirbhaya is one story that we heard.There are thousands more out there.

    I think every single person(regardless of whether it is granny down the street or friendly Ramu the grocer) who has ever voiced views even vaguely similar to this rapist is guilty of fostering rape culture. We as a society have made these monsters.

    Liked by 4 people

  7. IHM,

    But this kind of thinking is not restricted to his strata of society alone. Had that been the case, then I would have said and in fact argued that such people need counselling, exposure and a general awareness but then when the lawyers who are defending these rapists are echoing their thoughts then what do I say?
    The fact that they killed the girl just because she was shouting speaks volumes about their character and personality. Sadly, like someone above pointed out this is the kind of thinking even in IIM,s and IIT,s and also some reputed medical institutions in India. I had the misfortune of dating some “so called guys” working in top corporates in India and all in their late 20’s and none of them could even understand the concept of “choice”. In fact my ex-bf said to me once that “women like aggression, like being stalked ” and that was the last day I saw him. I saw no point in explaining to him, because he was a very well read and educated man who was working in a top bank in Mumbai and his family was very well known for their “liberal ideas”. Honestly, I see no point in explaining and reasoning with such people, because they are just so set in their thoughts that it’s impossible for them to change.
    I just think that such men like this rapist should be put away in prison and should not even be allowed a lawyer to defend them because seriously what is there to defend? Under no circumstances should such persons be pardoned.

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  8. What a mindset, psychology these people have is so difficult to understand. No amount of punishment is enough for people who do such brutal act and on top of it say all sort of disgraceful things to justify it.
    Such shameful men cannot control their own wagging organ, talk about controlling women, absurd. Feeling disappointed.

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  9. At least the man is honest. I mean, he’s voiced what almost 99% of the country thinks but doesn’t say aloud.

    I don’t know if we can change people and I don’t know if we can change thoughts and reasoning. But we can certainly influence actions. Put this same man on the streets of any foreign country and he’ll learn to behave himself whatever his thoughts might be. That’s all I want and that’s all we can hope for.

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    • I would prefer to leave the ******* alive, cut of his thing, let him be screwed mercilessly by his tribe – day in and day out – behind the walls of a high security prison for eternity. Until then, no, they will not understand the meaning of “consent”, “right to dignity” etc.

      No matter about “two wrongs do not make a right”, obviously treating people like this in a civilized manner is not going to change anything, leave alone their thinking, not even their behaviour. I suppose the interview with this subhuman ******* should be more than adequate to prove this point. They are not civilized, they do not deserve civilized treatment. But then, all this is wishful thinking in a country and society where even a film depicting the interview is considered as “inflammatory” and provoking ‘unnecessary fear” and hence banned – the moral being women should not be told the truth, they should not be given reason to protest against their status in society …..

      [Police in Delhi said they had gained an injunction against the film because the rapist’s remarks were “creating an atmosphere of fear and tension”]
      (http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-31724516) Implication: The said rapist is the only one who is spreading fear and tension by his words (not by his actions) and no one else in the entire country subscribes to the thought processes of the rapist. He did what he talks of, the others think and talk of it. “What was she doing in that area? What was she wearing? Maybe she invited it”. If there is no evidence of resistance, she maybe accused of acquiesing to the rapist’s demand and it being a case of consensual sex. If she resists, she asked to be killed. So damned if she does, damned if she doesn’t. Damned by society or damned by the rapist.

      [The BBC decision came hours after home minister Rajnath Singh told Parliament that the government will stop the documentary’s telecast abroad.]
      (http://www.ndtv.com/india-news/will-air-nirbhaya-documentary-today-says-bbc-744358?ndtv_alsoread)
      As if they can control what is telecast in other countries, and why would they want to? Afraid tourism would be hit? Afraid of the s*** hitting the ceiling? Afraid of the reality of our “proud culture” being exposed?

      Seriously there is no hope as long as individuals with such attitudes are alive and roaming free in society. Change can only come if mothers and teachers of today instil a basic sense of right and wrong in the minds of children today.

      Like

  10. Lot of these issues are arising from our long standing problems with women being treated as a non-person in households. A boy was wished for, treated differently, their birthdays celebrated and family resources dedicated to boy’s education. This resulted in boys growing up as feeling entitled and saw girls as a non-entity with no feelings or rights.
    An area which requires great improvement in mindsets, education, laws to protect victims and a desire by all to become “humans”.
    godumusings.com

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  11. Unfortunately, what he said is what most in our society believe! And this attitude thrives in all sections of our society! While our country stood up against these rapists and slogans like ‘castrate them’, ‘kill them’ etc etc were vehemently shouted… There was little or no attitude change at home. The mentality is men shouldn’t rape because we are their mothers, sisters and daughters, NOT because we’re humans and rape is a heinous crime. Even our politicians make statements like, humein apni maa behan ki raksha Karni hai! Bull shit sanskaar, culture and society!

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  12. What he said, filled me with so much of rage and anger, I felt like breaking his neck right there and then. If he along with his friends can commit such barbariousm, remorse can not be expected from them. But what angered me most is lack of fear. No remorse and no fear. As if he knows he’ll get away with it and will continue to live in prison all his life with all basic amenities.
    Even I have some people in my extended family who have such views…” girls wear mini skirts to discs and later complain of harrasments”. I detest those people in my family, couple of times I tried reasoning with them but then I gave up. No point in educating people who have turned deaf ears to sensitivity, sensibility and believing that women are humans too, just like them.
    I really dont know how many more decades India need to open it eyes. It just saddens me to the core

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  13. Just a day away is Holi, we will see all women groups doing their bits huddled in corners and loud ,out of control “gangs of boys” doing COLORS almost like coercion. It is images like these on which our boys and girls grow up, we prevent our girls from going out to “save ” them but end up curtailing their freedom and robbing them of their right to equal life.
    We promote “boys will be boys” and reinforce their solo entitlement to public places and the women in the society.
    Any voice that challenges these basic structures of patriarchy is seen as a rebellion and a threat and is often dealt with brutal force as is the case with Leslee Udwin’s documentary. We might have our opinions about it butby stopping its telecast our I & B ministry has only reinforced its patriarchal hypocrisy. Watching a rapist talk is outrageous, street harassment everyday ,sexual crimes are not.

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  14. Pingback: Nirbhaya’s Parents Talk to NDTV About Documentary on ‘India’s Daughter’ | The Life and Times of an Indian Homemaker

  15. This happened to me a year ago. I travelled from Bangalore to Chennai with a lot of luggage since I was moving out my stuffs from Bangalore. It was 5.00 AM in the morning and I had booked a cab to reach my home. I got off the bus and was walking towards my cab. That’s when I was pinched in my butt by an asshole. He fled the scene. I tried running behind him but had to give up because I had way too much luggage.

    I was wearing a chudidhar, completely covered from top to bottom. Did that stop that asshole from harassing me? I have been harassed multiple times during my travel in public transportation. Oh yes, every single time, I was wearing a chudidhar. Did that stop evil men from harassing me?

    Like

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