Home most unsafe place for women : A unique court-ordered study by Delhi Police has revealed.

Remaining unseen or unheard doesn’t make women safer. Having a Voice does.

But then, Being Silenced and Being Locked up would make anybody unsafe.

The study affirms what feminists have been saying all along – that asking potential victims to be invisible or to be sexually unattractive to the rapists does not control sexual crimes. (And has not for centuries)

This, and the society’s tolerance towards, and lack of seriousness towards sexual crimes makes criminals fearless. The more likely a criminal is to be excused, the more likely they are to assault. The more voiceless the victim, the more vulnerable they are.

Also – women’s absence from public spaces does not make public spaces safer for women.

We should also acknowledge that the Stranger Rape Myth is a misleading myth that makes it difficult for women to walk out and away from places of crime.

Do read.

Home most unsafe place for women

NEW DELHI: Over 60% offences of rape, molestation and ‘eve teasing’ (sexual harassment) recorded across Delhi till mid-September occurred inside the house and the accused were known to the survivors. A unique court-ordered study by Delhi Police of 44 police stations throughout the capital has revealed that women are most unsafe at home with their relatives or acquaintances.

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Martial Arts for women to fight back rapes?

Child marriage “is an evil worse than rape” and should be completely eradicated from society, said a Delhi court

19 Rape Facts that Khaps, Cops and Chautala should know.

Do you see a connection between this murder and the assault in Guwahati?

Can we blame everything on patriarchy?

What kind of men are likely to sexually assault women?

Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work!

26 thoughts on “Home most unsafe place for women : A unique court-ordered study by Delhi Police has revealed.

  1. That the Home is the Most Unsafe place for a Woman is a very alarming and anxiety provoking fact, for if that is a fact, then there is no place in the world which can be considered safe for women! In that case, the definition of ‘Home’ to be changed to ‘A place where a woman enjoys maximum care and security’, regardless of whether or not the people around are her own parents or relatives.

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  2. Patriarchy may not be responsible for all crimes against women, but it is a major factor accounting for the atrocities on women. The main question is, what is the better alternative to it, for even if we consider Matriliny as the option, there are reported cases of Maternal Uncles and cousins too having abused the female members in their family. Perhaps, giving girls education to become financially independent is a good way to make women less vulnerable to domestic abuse or violence, as they can move out of the house if they are not secure within it. And, it might be a good idea to send girls between the age of 10- 20 years, which is their most vulnerable period, to stay in Boarding schools, with all – female staff, eg. Convents, during which girls should be made aware of the dangers to which they are liable, and taught to guard against them, as well as to judge different types of people, and
    Know the kind of men likely to abuse them, to be able to keep a safe distance from them.

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    • Patriarchy may not be responsible for all crimes against women, but it is a major factor accounting for the atrocities on women. The main question is, what is the better alternative to it, for even if we consider Matriliny as the option, there are reported cases of Maternal Uncles and cousins too having abused the female members in their family.

      IHM – Nuclear families where parents from both the sides are welcome to stay if they need caring in their old age are better than patrilineal or matrilineal societies. The couple chooses any names they like – not necessarily an ancestral name.

      Perhaps, giving girls education to become financially independent is a good way to make women less vulnerable to domestic abuse or violence, as they can move out of the house if they are not secure within it. And, it might be a good idea to send girls between the age of 10- 20 years, which is their most vulnerable period, to stay in Boarding schools, with all – female staff, eg. Convents, during which girls should be made aware of the dangers to which they are liable, and taught to guard against them, as well as to judge different types of people, and
      Know the kind of men likely to abuse them, to be able to keep a safe distance from them.

      IHM: But these are the years to explore the world, and segregation of sexes and Silencing of Voices imply abuse is the most natural thing to happen when men and women interact. This is not true. Abuser is empowered by the blaming, shaming and silencing of victims. If we were more open about abuse and if the potential abusers knew that any sexual crimes against anybody would be taken seriously, then they would not be so fearless.

      Instead there should be less taboo on women’s sexuality, and more stress on requirement of consent and women’s right to freedom and acknowledgment that women are sexual beings too. There should be utmost respect for the rights of women – and absolute intolerance towards misogyny. If the male family members are aware that the girl’s voice would not be ignored and any mention of sexual abuse would be taken seriously, they would not see a girl as an easy target.

      Safest women are those who are valued by their families – but valued not for being chaste, obedient or sanskaari (which makes them easy target, because the same could keep them silent in case of abuse, out of self blame and guilt, or out of a false sense of duty – to save the family’s honor) but those women who are valued as equal family members and where the family is aware that abuse is a possibility and where women’s rights, freedom and happiness are taken as seriously as any other members’.

      Liked by 4 people

      • Your ideas about how men and patriarchal families should treat women are good, but they will take years and years to come into effect. Till then, taking the conditions as they are, we should have
        Some immediate way of protecting young girls.
        Still, we should take the wishes of a girl into consideration, and if she feels happy and secure with her own family, there should not be any pressure on her to go and stay in a hostel.
        However, in view of your own figure of the majority of sex abuse cases inflicted, being within a woman’s home, I don’t have much respect and faith left In families dominated by men, as not all men in any Patriarchal ( not just patrilineal) society, esp. In traditional societies like India are so noble, to realise the value of what you advise and act upon it. Their first desire and striving is to possess women in their care, and keep them under their subjugation!

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      • Put boys in boarding schools? There little or young boys will be at the mercy of their teachers and trainers, who are less likely these days, to inculcate good culture and values
        in them and educate them properly (as they used to show in the good, old Hindi films like ‘Jagruti’ starring Abhi Bhattacharya as the noble and idealistic school teacher in a boys’ school),and more likely to violate and sodomise, or titillate by showing porn films, and spoil the minds of the innocent young boys in their care,(in place of girls who will then be less available to satisfy their lustful and dirty appetite), as they show in the episodes of the serial
        ‘Crime Patrol- Dastak’ on Sony TV!
        It is very disappointing to learn from that program that Men committing crimes against women like rape, and acid attacks or burning to death of women who resist their advances, more often than not, get away, either totally or with light punishment,because the police officers, who are mostly male, empathise and side with the male criminals, and try to shift the responsibility of the crimes on the victims themselves, on flimsy grounds like the provocative dress of modern women. It does not occur to them to take into account the fact that many of the victims nowadays are minors(<10 yrs, in school uniform) raped by the school staff in the school campus! Why is that?

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    • Removing a probable victim out of a potentially hostile environment is only half baked version of and a half hearted attempt at finding a solution to what ails our society.On second thoughts, its not even a solution.
      What about attempting to remove a probable criminal from the picture? Educating probable criminals about what is wrong and unacceptable, about accountability?
      Also, I am not sure I understand what this means – “….to judge different types of people and know the kind of men likely to abuse them, to be able to keep a safe distance from them.”
      Sounds like once again, we are putting the onus of their safety in their own shoulders.
      Isolating young girls in an all-female environment for 10 years,and filling their minds with how susceptible they are and then leaving them to fend for themselves – will it work?
      You may shut me off from the outside world for a certain period of time , then drill it into my head about how the world outside is a jungle and how its filled with big bad wolves.But will it keep me safe? No.The wolves are still wolves.And they are all over the place.
      If safety is the need of the hour then take care of the wolves.
      Send the boys to boarding schools for the period when they are ‘most likely’ to be hostile, teach them to respect every individual be it male or female.

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        • Again, how must a school go about the task of ‘…..how to recognise them as apart from the good boys…’?
          Are you saying it is possible that one can look at or interact with a male and determine if he is a potential rapist?
          And what does ‘…and how to deal effectively with them’ mean?
          I am totally lost as to what these lines mean.

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        • (1) Judging between good and bad men:

          I agree that one cannot e absolutely sure about the character of unless one is in regular contact with him, and some wolves get away very well in ‘sheep’s clothing’. Still, if you observe them well,
          At least a good boy/man will never behave cheaply or talk vulgar jokes with girls/women, whereas a wolf will expose himself in one way or the other by his way of looking at or touching girls/women.
          That itself will give girls/women the idea about whether to be friendly with him, or keep away from him, or at least a distance from him. That is, avoid going alone with him any where, or accepting a lift or gift from him, for that is how wolves trap women!

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    • Wao, replacing one kind of archy with another is your only alternative? 20 years working in the field have been yelling and screaming replacing one archy by another only creates anarchy. Please educate your self about what is going on in the field.
      Haven’t you heard of all female boarding houses and care homes female co-opting with men in power outside to supply girls or children.
      It is 2014 start treating women as human and equal citizens no exceptions. Any crime against any citizen should be treated seriously and stringently.

      Educating women in good but that is not enough or else there would be no white collar crimes in ivory towers of power and capital. As long as abusers know they can get away with an offense they’ll commit one. Destigmatize crime against women, break silence and act promptly to punish the offender is the only solution.
      Peace,
      Desi Girl

      Like

      • That will never happen in this narrow- minded, male- chauvinistic country, where only a few men are enlightened and broad minded, at least not in the near future.
        In fact, the number of sexual crimes on women are increasing in 2014 instead of
        Decreasing, so while we do have to try to change the mindset and attitude of Indian Men and society towards women so that they learn to respect women as equal human beings and citizens, we have to take some drastic urgent steps to reduce the occurrence of rape/ rape-cum-murder of women. We can’t wait and allow crimes to
        Continue TILL THE DAY MEN UNDERGO CHANGE OF MIND AND HEART!

        Liked by 1 person

        • //In fact, the number of sexual crimes on women are increasing in 2014 instead of
          Decreasing//

          Rapes are not increasing – Rape Reporting has increased. Now more victims and their families are finding the confidence to report rapes. In the past rape victims were either honor killed, or silenced, or married off to their rapists.

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        • I don’t agree. It is true that more cases are being reported now than before but still, it is said that the number of cases reported
          Is just the tip of the iceberg, as the major number of cases still go unreported for saving the Family Honour. Your impressions are based on the statistics in cities. For in the traditional rural India, people are still at least a century behind us in their thinking.
          There, the society is governed not so much by Courts as by the
          Khap Panchayats, which still dictate and endorse atrocious penalties like Social condemnation and boycott, or Honour killing of the rape victims. Or else, the victim is forced to marry the rapist to avoid social stigma!
          There, in rural region, whose population forms a large part of
          the total Indian population, Rapists are not punished, leave alone being killed, but can absolve themselves of their guilt by marrying their victim, no matter how badly they treat the wife afterwards, whereas boys and girls who marry outside the caste for Love, are Hanged to death, even now, in this 21st century!
          For them, Love is a crime,not rape! If the same boy were to rape
          or cheat the girl by false promise of marriage, instead of living up to his promise, that would be pardoned by that society!

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    • I see that your intentions are genuine but you’re falling prey to the “isolate the vulnerable” propaganda. Teenage years are the time to explore the world. It is no time to stay holed up in a strict environment for the fear of predators.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Victims are routinely silenced in our culture. Your solution of segregation and isolation renders the victims both SILENT and INVISIBLE.

      A great climate for crimes to be hushed up even better. (Girl got raped in girls hostel run by women? That’s not possible, no, a man can never break through the window. So, let’s not even take the complaint seriously, let’s not even register the crime.)

      Also – the more invisible women become in public places, the more victim blaming increases (she was raped? when she was going for a walk? how could she go for a walk? surely, she was asking for it!)

      Also what kind of country locks up the victims and allows the criminals to roam freely on the streets?

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      • It would be no different from what we face today. Victims would continue to be blamed with:

        “Why was she out of the hostel – didn’t she know it was unsafe? We have created hostels for their safety and only bad girls who want to be raped step out of these hostels.”

        Edited to add – and the fear of being blamed and shamed like this would keep the victims silent.

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      • Why, haven’t you heard that the Arab countries of the Middle East with Medieva mindsets do that? The only difference is that they lock up women in their own homes,with Burkha to top it, while men go around philandering and maiming/killing women for supposed immorality or killing a man in self defence.
        So, If you are talking about the 21st century as though it is a period of enlightenment around the world, you are sadly mistaken!
        That is only true of the United States and probably Canada, where people
        as a whole have become more modernised and civilised in thought and attitudes towards women (except the members of the party of orthodox thinkers like Ronald Reagan, who oppose the right of women to Medical Termination of Pregnancy
        in Rape cases,which they consider as ‘God’s Will’, as if their rape had happened
        by God’s Will)!

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        • It should take only 1 or 2 generation. If the current crop of boys are raised ot treat women with respect , for that they need to be taught right,
          A bot hard if they have idiot parents especially patriarchial dad’s but then we ar ehumans eventually this gen will die off, if we fix the next gen slowly in a gen or 2 they will be self thinking, fair men all around.

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        • Sorry, I am not at all optimistic about the status and condition of women in this society, wherein females are killed for 101 reasons like being born a girl, dowry, not able to bear sons, family honour on being raped and inter caste marriage, etc. I don’t think our country people have come to that stage where they will teach their sons to treat women with respect as equal fellow human beings, except in cities, and that too in good, educated and cultured social circles, which form only the creamy layer of Indian
          Society at present !

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        • Not to rain on your parade, MR; but if I look at where we are in Western Europe nowadays, there is still a long way to go. While compared to India, things are quite okay here, there still is a lot of misogyny around. One or two generations is a very optimistic estimate, I would rather estimate five to ten. Even feminists cannot always raise decent sons, because the overall culture that influences everyone is so misogynistic.

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    • I think the main change has to be in the empowerment of women. A girl is only safe in her mother’s house if the mother has the power to keep abusive men away from her. This is not the case in many Western nuclear families, both because women fear their husbands, and also because they have internalized misogyny to such a degree that they think it is okay for male relatives to abuse their daugthers, or that their daugther must be lying about the abuse.

      Also, boarding schools would have to be headed by feminist-thinking women – some all-female environments can be a living hell for girls, for example the Catholic institutions for unmarried mothers, which were basically slavery in disguise, because the nuns heading them were so misogynistic.

      There is evidence that girls learn better in all-female environments, but I agree with Indian Homemaker that girls should not be locked up in those institutions. Just be given a safe place to come back to.

      Like

  3. It is so easy to commit a crime against a woman because
    – chances are she may not report it under pressure or direct threats from family members
    – even if she reports it, law enforcement will not act justly and swiftly
    – neighbors, relatives, and society provide a cushion of support to the criminals in the form of “understanding” or “preserving honor” or victim blaming rather than standing by the victim.
    – response to the crime takes the form of even more segregation and isolation which makes crimes even more likely to go hushed up by rendering the victim not only SILENT but also INVISIBLE

    What this report is telling us is that our attitudes toward women must change. That is the only way to bring down crimes against women. Treat women as equal human beings with the same rights and opportunities.
    Place any human being at the lowest level in the hierarchy and crimes against them are bound to be committed with impunity by those who’ve been given absolute, unquestioned power.

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