Dad wears short shorts to teach daughter what she wears is everybody’s business and everybody’s approval proves her great worth.

Dad Wears Short Shorts to Teach Daughter a Lesson, Becomes Online Celeb (Sept 2013)

Thanks for sharing the link Nidaa

Image from here, https://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/dad-wears-short-shorts-to-teach-daughter-a-lesson–becomes-online-celeb-171218029.html

‘Mackintosh decided to give his daughter a taste of her own medicine by dressing just like her. He cut the legs off of an old pair of jeans and put them on. His daughter tried to remain stoic all through dinner and a game of mini-golf, but finally broke when they made a stop for milkshakes, refusing to get out of the car with him.’

He said, “I hope that young women everywhere understand their great worth. I will look like an idiot any day if that point gets across.”

So here are some comments that convey how women are supposed to understand their own ‘great worth’.

Comment 1:

My daughter gets upset when we won’t let her by ‘sexy’ clothing. We tell her modest is hottest. Her body is for her and her husbands eyes only. And hopefully she will find the guy that loves her modesty. We know God has that special someone for her. And as a mother of two older teenage boys they tell us exactly what they think when they see girls with booty shorts on and mid drift shirts they are thinking oh she looks so pretty. They are thinking she is trashy and easy. Thank God they choose modest girlfriends. And treat them like ladies. Love this dad!

IHM: 

Women’s worth. 

1. Why tell a young girl her body is everybody’s business and belongs to her future ‘husband’s eyes only’?  

Here is what Will Smith said, and I agree. 

How can you teach her that you’re in control of her body? If I teach her that I’m in charge … she’s going to replace me with some other man when she goes out in the world. ..She has got to have command of her body.

2. ‘Modest is hottest’ is contradictory – and both objectify women’s bodies and both are meant to control women’s sexuality. 

Eg. Bikini vs Burka: The Debauchery of Women

Why must an adult fit into somebody’s ideas of ‘hottest’?

Who decides what is “‘sexy’ clothing”? The same people who also decide who should not wear this “‘sexy’ clothing”

3. The teenage boys will be disappointed when they realise that many women may not value their approval or opinion. 

Eg. What do ‘Modest’ women have that their ‘Immodest’ sisters don’t…

4. The teenage boys are being given the impression that women who wear short shorts deserve their disapproval. How likely are they to blame women’s clothing for sexual assaults?

5. What if these teenage boys find short shorts ‘hotter’ than modest shorts? WIll they then ‘respect’ the women they are finding attractive, or call them sluts and try to like marriageable women who have been raised to seek their approval? What if the teenage boys are not interested in women? 

Eg. That special combination of beauty and innocence, the pretty inspires men to protect and defend it.

6. Will they judge, blame, shame, control and feel disappointed when they find that many women own their own bodies?  

7. Aren’t the teenage boys being raised with a sense of entitlement? 

Eg. Boy friends are new parents

Another comment:

Just like his shirt says “Best Dad Ever!” Why because he cares about the character and dignity of that little girl he hopes to give away on her wedding day!

IHM: Why make being ‘given away’ in marriage a given in that little girl’s life? 

Comment 3:

When i was a teenager i wore too much makeup. My dad walked past me one day and said…cute girls dont wear makeup. I have not worn makeup since. Funny part is my mom had talked to me about this but it didnt stop me from wearing makeup. This is why we need more GOOD dads in the home.

IHM: A woman’s worth lies in being found ‘cute’ by men?

Comment 4 – Not surprisingly,

I am a single man who admires a woman’s body but I do believe young women in school even university need to mantain decency in thier attire. Showing off all your legs and your butt cheeks is not at all attractive…it’s disgusting !

What makes some teenage sons and daughters grow up believing that women were created to make men’s world ‘attractive’?

How about – You don’t owe prettiness to anyone.?

Related Posts:

“So why do we wear clothes again??”

A response to: Why we think women activists should change their attitude of “wear what you like”

The Miss Italia beauty contest has banned bikinis in favour of swimsuits.

Weird, funny facts about Misogynists.

 And how women’s bodies are different, so they need to be covered for their own safety.

26 thoughts on “Dad wears short shorts to teach daughter what she wears is everybody’s business and everybody’s approval proves her great worth.

  1. The way modern youth culture is going BOTH boys & girls seem to be of the opinion that their ‘worth’ as a human being is based on the general consensus of their peers as to how ‘hot’ they are.
    Those deemed ‘unattractive’ by their youthful peers are treated with contempt if not outright hostility & nastiness – so I can see where the ‘peer pressure’ to look ‘hot’ comes from.
    Frankly I find the devaluation of people based on looks repulsive but the ‘halo effect’- (a cognitive bias in which the ‘attractiveness’ of a person influences the observer’s feelings & thoughts about that person’s character in a positive manner) & ‘lookism’ (positive stereotypes, prejudice, and preferential treatment given to physically attractive people, or more generally to people whose appearance matches cultural preferences) are now proven facts.
    Welcome to the 21st century!!!
    Gone are the fears of being entangled in the ‘Veil of Maya’ & the dreaded perils of judging by appearances as forewarned by ancient philosophies!
    Let us all hail in a ‘new era’ of ‘body fascism’ where those who don’t meet very ‘specific’ standards of pulchritude are deemed physically unattractive, sexually undesirable, & completely worthless as a person.
    Yes, I am being sarcastic.
    But somehow in this ‘information age’ I thought we’d get a bit smarter.
    I mean like the commercial says you can now ‘download the world in an instant’, right?
    Nope, sorry. This access to information has just increased the importance of vain, silly superficial folks. Blah.

    Like

    • I agree. We are encouraged to use fixed standards of appearances as the only way to judge or to view/evaluate. And again there are very rigid rules about what you must consider good/worthy to look at. Loved Erin Brockowich for this.

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  2. The number of people commending this dad on this shit is horrifying. When you read the story, you see that he pushed his daughter to an emotional state where she cried about stepping outside the car with him, and was ashamed of him and her clothes.

    Trying to teach her about ‘modesty’, he taught her how to be ashamed of herself and her body.

    Why would you call this guy the ‘Greatest Dad Ever’? How about Emotional Abuser? That’s more like it.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I saw his being shared by my relatives and friends. Seeing the positive comments, I thought it must be some hilarious post. You know what irked me most? The girl is as interfering as her dad. Why should it bother her if her dad walk around in shorts? How is that supposed to teach her a lesson?

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      • Absolutely! I found that weird too. Why should what anyone wears be anybody else’s business! Once people get that into their heads, nobody will be bothered about what someone else is wearing.

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      • “Why should it bother her if her dad walk around in shorts? How is that supposed to teach her a lesson?”
        Well, this is the way teenagers think-
        OMG !!!!
        Everyone is staring at us/me!!!!
        I’m gonna die of embarrassment!!!!
        Gawwwww!!!!
        Because you know EVERYTHING is about them & their social status & peers – my teen Indian nieces used to get embarrassed when everyone stares at their gori aunty (me) UNTIL they figured out it was a HUGE status booster to have an American aunty. Now they get invited to all sorts of parties & events if they promise to bring gore aunty.

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  4. Pingback: Why are these dads such a threat to patriarchal social structures? | The Life and Times of an Indian Homemaker

  5. I would have laughed my head off and encouraged my dad to go get milkshakes for all of us🙂 what he does with his clothes is his problem. But kids are sensitive, a couple times my son told me offhanded that when i come to school maybe i should dress like other moms !!! i exploded i think, i told him very firmly i will dress how i want and if he’s upset, i can miss his poetry reading . I also explained ot him, when i go to school it means i have taken the day off and i dont like to be dressed in skirts and all polished since i have to do it for work. I’m going to be in my mommy jeans and shirts and i thought i looked good in it🙂 he understood and constant lecturing helped i like ot think… he is least bothered by clothes – his or someone else’s now..

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      • During my schooling days (20 yrs back) one of my classmate’s mother came in jeans and t-shirt to drop him to school in kinetic honda. She was employed in bank in mumbai / somewhere and got transferred to my locality. A mother wearing jeans is something which we haven’t seen at that time in our locality. The guys started to stare at his mother and even his classmates started asking questions and passed some comments which made him very uneasy. I think he tried his best to make his mother not to come to school in this way. But he was not successful. When 30 – 40 people stare at mother with hawk eyes and pass comments, any son will be perturbed. I can feel that guy’s mental agony. Instead of shutting your kid’s mouth senselessly, try to understand what he is speaking.
        Your kid cannot shut the mouth and eyes of 30 – 40 other kids. Or can you file an FIR and send all these kids to juvenile home?

        We can also use our brains to think and understand instead of sticking to what we feel as right stubbornly. Show your stubbornness in some other thing.
        It is upto you to listen / choose to ignore what is kid is going through.

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        • How do women benefit from worrying about everybody’s opinion of their clothing?

          I hope those young boys, who are now twenty years older, realise that their comments amounted to sexual harassment.

          They were free to think what they thought, but the idea that they could control what other students’ mothers wore, was born out of the sense of entitlement many young Indian boys grow up with. There are chances that they saw their mothers’ and sisters’ clothing and personal choices being controlled by random people and couldn’t understand how this young boy had a mom who didn’t have to be answerable to family elders, neighbours and random strangers, his class mates etc.

          Twenty years ago was 1994? Women in some parts of India were going about their lives, without being harassed, wearing spaghetti straps and shorts and cropped tops.

          I hope boys like these ones get the opportunity to travel to these places and see for themselves that women’s rights and freedoms being respected is the first and crucial step towards a fair and civilised society. Where women can step out without worrying about random strangers’ reactions to their clothing, one can expect to have better managed law and order for everyone – men, children, the elderly.

          Please don’t excuse sexual harassment, even if it is caused by ignorance and a sense of entitlement or inaccurate ideas of Indian culture (etc). When we don’t even acknowledge a wrong, how do we even begin to deal with it?

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        • Are you sure that such incidents cannot happen now at schools? You can find some “aunty” admirers everywhere.
          Leaving aside what is right and what is wrong, can you give a practical solution to the below questions?

          What do you expect the kid to do if his mother is the center of attraction?
          (Just take it easy, like Stifler ignoring Finch?)

          How should he/his mother deal with a bunch of senior boys?

          Should the mother scold the kid instead of trying to understand what he is going through?

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        • I think the most practical thing to do would be for the school to educate and inform the senior students against crimes like Ragging (in any form), and all students against Street Sexual Harassment (‘eve teasing’, passing ‘obscene’ comments, ‘vulgarity’ etc). Both are legal offences I think and the student should be guided about respecting the law of the land (even if they have misogynistic thoughts and beliefs).

          One warning against criminals being allowed on the campus should suffice.

          It would also help if they were guided about the difference between admiring someone and sexually harassing them.

          Liked by 1 person

        • IHM has already given an excellent response, so I won’t reiterate everything she said. Do you see that in the situation you mentioned, the problem is with the boys staring and making someone feel uncomfortable? Not with the person making a choice to dress? Do you even see these boys’ behavior as wrong? This is how we encourage harassment – by resorting to victim blaming and by condoning those who do wrong.

          Also wanted to clarify – my son is not so regressive as to tell me to dress conservatively – and the kids in his school are not so regressive to stare at someone wearing shorts or jeans or whatever – here even grandmas wear shorts.
          My son wanted me to look more “fashionable” on a day when I felt like being very casual and that’s when I told him I will have my own style, thank you very much,
          Mr. Ralph Lauren, and we both laughed.

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        • You are right, Raj, there is an age when children start to wake up to sexual feelings and realize they parents also have a sex life or can arouse friends… Parents have to be very sensitive at that time, especially mothers of sons.

          As for me, one of my teenage daughters has started giving me fashion advice, remarking I used to be hot and what happened lol. For her sake I made efforts, because I believe taking care of my image is taking care of hers.

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  6. You can’t fault the dad’s actions. He did not beat his daughter. He did not punish her. He did nothing to her. He just put on shorts himself. He is a free man too.

    You can’t argue with the basic premise of what this man did. If his daughter has a right to wear clothes her father hates, her father should have a right to wear something his daughter hates.

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  7. i love how you don’t see the hypocrisy of the daughter. she judges people based on how they are dressed. she judged her own father. which means everyone else is judging her by how she dresses. she figured it out, but you apparently can’t.

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  8. This is a great object lesson. Being human means making judgments about people based on our senses. Vision is the prime sense. All people will judge you based on your clothing choices.

    The Dad’s point here is that men desire a woman who shares her sexual nature and appetites only with him. His daughter, not yet married, should ideally save that aspect of herself to maximize her MMV (Marriage Market Value) and secure the best possible mate. Clothing that advertizes a woman that will happily share her body with a Tinder match minimizes MMV.

    This Dad’s behavior is desirable because while women are the gatekeepers of sex, men are the gatekeepers of commitment, and he knows it. If a woman desires commitment with the highest MMV men, she must maximize her MMV to get it, and that means little things like modesty, self control, low to zero N count, femininity, submission, etc. are important and build her value to the best possible mate. Those have to be taught, usually by an aware Dad.

    None of this applies if a woman subscribes to modern feminist thought. She can ride the carousel, have a career, and end up 30+, beginning to hit her wall, her best years of fertility and energy behind her, desperately trying to sucker some clueless beta into a marriage that she will frivorce after a couple of years and a child or two. Alimony and support payments provide a nice income while she hits the marketplace trying to find the next clueless beta, all while asking “where have the good men gone?”

    Ask yourself if you would tell a young woman to follow that path.

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  9. Pingback: The Changing Role of Dads | The Life and Times of an Indian Homemaker

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