Sharing an email.
I was a girl who had to fight tooth and nail for my choice. The way I dress, the way I remain non-religious in a conservative ****** family, the way I chose my stream, the way I chose how to have fun…
It was because I think my mum believed that you shouldn’t agree to everything your child says for she will go out of hands. May be that is why I had to start asking my mum atleast a week ago even if it’s permission to watch a movie with friends.
Things changed after going to Chennai and then to Delhi for highers. I started doing things without asking until an incident taught me that I’d better inform even if I didnt get permission. And surprise surprise. Permissions, Oks and YES cam easily from my parents.
Movies, road trips, dine outs, parties… Ok mole (Beta). The hours I spent trying to put together point for arguing with my mumm wasn’t needed at all.
It was disconcerting rather than liberating. Suspicious even. My parents accepting that their daughter is actually grown up? Last week we made a sudden plan to go to Goa. “Mumm, I am going to Goa.” “Ok Mole… Enjoy”. Huh!!???
Am I so tuned to her disapproval, fights with parents but uncomfortable with this liberation? Or do I need time to get used to it. Is this what you are calling ‘seeking validation’?
Of course when I come home, she makes comments on how I dress, about behaving like a good Indian ****** girl etc etc. It’s back to the same ‘trying to control’ when I come home on occasional weekends.
Do Indian girls find it hard to accept liberation even when they have it? Arghh I need a reality check!!!
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