Sharing a question Kay asked in a comment in response to this email: “My husband gives me the usual ‘you have not just married me, you have married my family..’ sermon”
At what point should educated, 21st century women who can think liberally for themselves, take responsibility for themselves and perhaps forgo the arranged marriage institution? I’m pretty sure the internet is rife with these stories wherein any person (you don’t need to be highly educated for this) realizes that an getting arranged marriage is like stepping into a field full of land mines. Sure you may be able to navigate your way around the mines, but odds are, you’re probably going to step on one and blow yourself up.
Surely, it can’t be surprising that the complete stranger you married turned out to be someone different than the person you expected him to be (and speaking to someone on skype for 6 months doesn’t count).
In addition to setting up marriage prep courses for the socially challenged who can’t seem to find their own spouses, perhaps we can also make women aware that they can date, have relationships, break relationships, do whatever they please.
I think these posts give an idea of what young Indian women, who allow their parents to pressurize them into semi forced marriages, face:
“Only thing I can can think of now is to take a spoon of boiling oil and put on my cheeks. I will see then who marries a girl with a burnt face”
“This man is openly threatening his daughter and is instigating others to burn alive their daughters.”
A comment: One more thing, had I been financially independent I would have never got married.
“A clandestine, and irresponsible, affair may prove dangerous. A city girl learnt it the hard way,”
An email: An Old fashioned boy friend and a Liberal girl friend.
How illegal bans on Valentine’s day and birthday parties are connected with dowry deaths and sex selection.
What Khaps need is a strictly implemented law against Forced Marriages.
Girls morally bound not to have sex before marriage, says fast track court judge
“let me ask – how many girls in city remain pure till marriage ?”
“Both boy and girl were responsible, who had done marriage without informing their parents.”
No second chances for an Indian daughter.
Boys and Girls Holding Hands …
And what might help:
18 questions for young women (and men) of ‘marriageable age’.
“Here’s what I would tell my future/potential daughter, if I ever have one.”
A detailed check list of conditions from modern young women of marriageable age.
What would you not change for love?
“Why didn’t these women find life partners by dating?”
If your boyfriend is abusing you physically…