Growing up with Brat Three.
So we are learning on the job, with support from, links from this blog, some instinct and from more love than imagined possible until we met this little someone who was a near stranger until she joined our family.
Here are two early lessons.
1. December 2012
In the annual function at her school, I had picked her from backstage after her dance was over and was planning for us to go out for lunch and then head home, as we looked for the exit gate, she noticed a large screen.
I was startled, “Your annual function… You too could be seen there when you were on the stage, dancing with the candle in your hand.”
She stares at the screen.
IHM: “Let’s go inside and watch the program.”
Inside she is stunned, staring at the stage and then turning to look at the audience. “Who are all these people?”
IHM: The parents and families of all your friends who are performing on stage. Like I have come to watch you, they have come to watch their children.”
Brat Three: “They are the mummies and papas of all these children?”
IHM: Yes, now watch the kids on the stage….”
Brat 3: All the children’s mummies and papas… so many children’s mummies and papas…? They all have mummy and papa?!!
We are alike this way. Like us she is trying to understand why, when there are so many parents and so many children in this world, did some children and some parents have to be without parents and without children.
2. October 2012
“What can you do if children don’t study?”
One day when I was helping her with Maths, she asked, “What happens if children don’t want to study.”
IHM: “We explain to them why they need to study, all the stories they can read, places they can travel to, things they can understand and do if they study…”
Brat 3: “If they don’t understand, then what can you do?”
IHM: “Hmmm ….maybe explain again?”
Brat 3: “What can you do if children still don’t understand and they say they don’t want to study?”
IHM: “Maybe we tell them they have no choice? Fun and work must go together.”
Brat 3: “If they still don’t understand? What can you do if children still refuse to do their work?”
IHM: “Maybe we can send them to their room? Or cancel TV time or park time?”
Brat 3: “If they still don’t listen, then what can you do?”
IHM: “What would you do if you were trying to make such a child understand?”
Brat 3:“I know such children are sent back to the orphanage.”
IHM: “No. We won’t do that. Cancelling ice cream for a week, or park time or TV time is what we would do.”
Not sure how this should have been handled. I wanted her to see this as a simple fact, not as an attempt to reassure her. I realize now that it would have been too much to expect her to completely believe whatever I said immediately.
This is a picture from around that time.