“There are some men who are more likely to be sexually aggressive than others.”

Sharing an email a young woman, a student, received from the Police Department.

Please note the part in block quotes. Why do you think we don’t read this more often?

Dear IHM,

I was reading your last few posts on rape and how the police reacted. That reminded me of an email I got from the police chief of my university in the US. Wonder how many years it would take for our police to react in a similar way.

“… The Police department is currently investigating a sexual assault… The victim reported she was sexually assaulted during a party. The suspect has not been identified. Anyone with information related to this incident should contact the Police Department.
The Police Department urges students to utilize some safety precautions as you plan and attend late-night events: limit attendance to friends and guests of friends, and identify reliable safety monitors who can alert police in the event something suspicious or criminal occurs.
Be aware that a seemingly nice, regular individual can turn into a rapist. There are some men who are more likely to be sexually aggressive than others.
Characteristics can include someone who:
* Does not listen to you, talks over you or pretends not to hear you.
* Ignores your personal space boundaries.
* Does what he wants, regardless of what you want.
* Expresses excessive anger or aggression towards women in general.
* Acts excessively jealous or possessive.
* Drinks heavily. Many perpetrators do not pre-meditate their indecent acts. They actually believe that the victim will enjoy it and won’t say no. Anger, embarrassment, resentment, and selfishness take over and the perpetrator arrives at “the point of no return.”
A woman cannot always prevent a rape. However, there are some things that can be done to help reduce the chances of being raped:
* Be forceful and firm. Do not worry about being polite!
* Trust your gut-level feelings. If you believe that you are being pressured, then you probably are. Leave the situation immediately; call out for help.
* If you observe suspicious or criminal activity, report it immediately to police by calling 911.
Everyone, both women and men, should know what to do if you know someone who has been sexually assaulted:
* Call someone you trust — no matter how late it is. You should not be alone. Consider calling a close friend or a staff member.
* Go to a safe place. Consider going to your room, a friend’s room, or anywhere you will feel safe.
* Seek medical treatment IMMEDIATELY. Dont wash up, change clothes, eat, brush your teeth, go to the bathroom or brush your hair, as you might destroy useful evidence. If you are unsure about reporting the assault to police, it makes sense to allow medical professionals to collect evidence to preserve the option of later making a police report.
* Report the incident to police, whether or not you plan to press charges. Reporting the assault does not commit you to filing charges. You can make that decision later in collaboration with the Commonwealth’s Attorney.
* Do NOT blame yourself.  Even if you believe you were naive, not cautious enough, or even foolish, it is NOT your fault.  Your behavior DID NOT cause the assault.
* Get help and support, such as counseling.  A sexual assault is an extremely traumatic incident,  and you will need help dealing with the situation.
* Take advantage of the resources available for victims of sexual assault or encourage their use.
Sources of support include the Office of the Dean of Students, the Women’s Center, Counseling and Psychological Services in Student Health, the Sexual Assault Resource Agency, and the Victim and Witness Assistance Programs. Students wishing to pursue charges through the University can do so through the Sexual Assault Board. For more information….
Please take all necessary steps to protect yourself and each other — and know that you should never hesitate to call 911.”
What do you think of this email by the Police?

12 thoughts on ““There are some men who are more likely to be sexually aggressive than others.”

  1. This is what is needed in any country; irrespective of how much action is to be taken. I really liked the way statements are framed – Even if you believe you were naive, not cautious enough, or even foolish, it is NOT your fault.

    This should on Grade 7 – Grade 8 school textbooks! Brilliant.

    Like

  2. Dont know why but I welled up after reading the email. Those were such reassuring words from the US Police Department.

    Wish our Police were as understanding and reassuring. It’s a shame that they come across as so unreliable…to the victims of course! They are perfectly reliable and understanding to the rapists you see!

    Like

  3. For a minute i missed out that the police chief was from the US and thought–wow–we have someone in India writing this! I wish someone in our police force reads this.

    Like

  4. Very thoughtful email by the US police! But our society seems to believe the opposite of this:

    Do NOT blame yourself. Even if you believe you were naive, not cautious enough, or even foolish, it is NOT your fault. Your behavior DID NOT cause the assault.

    Don’t you think so? Our society blames the victim for being dressed provocatively and ‘invite’ the assault. I hope our police department emulates the example by their US counterparts. It will take ages, I know. We do not seem to be ready to come of out of the “We cannot follow Western culture” shell.

    Like

  5. Can someone persuade TOI and other leading newpapers to have this as headline for all to at least read it ,,Can we send a copy of this to all police stations . Can we post this all over . Can HR have a similar policy that is posted at impt corners . Can we speak abt this to our family and friends specially if we have someone in police . there will be some sensible people everywhere ..can we make them join the cause and let others slowly start believing that victim blaming is not right and awareness can avoid incidents and also that it is important to provide support post some bad incident has happened .

    My major concern post rape is about injuries and STD infection on the victim and her mental health , and i think that should be . Unfortunately victims in india have to worry about how people will react , who will marry them and will they be rapped again by police ??

    Like

  6. Now that for a change is GOOD advice, totally agree with the points.. and thankfully it mentions both men-woman.. I would have hated if it said just women.. because sexual assaults happen to both .. and since this was from someone in Usa.. no wonder both men and woman are included..

    if it was a indian blogger or police it would have just said Women🙂

    I am not sure about how good the indian police will be if 911 is called , because they hardly make it on time ever..

    I also would like to add here that the PUBLIC, if they see something happening it does not matter if you know the victim.. If you see something wrong happening to anyone , CALL THe police or if nothing else START SHOUTING at top of ur voice

    most of these assaults happen because assaulter’s know , no one is going to do anything and if someone is seen doing something , they just might stop the heinous act they are doing .. which may save someone ..

    YES People the spectators DO SOMETHING anything .. stop watching the movie .. what they see is not a REEL it is REAL.. ACT on it

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s