Another email… and this one is from Australia.
Dear Indian Homemaker,
I am long time lurker and reader (not a contributor) I read your blog and thank you for helping me understand the Indian pyche.
A bit about me- I am a 3rd generation Indian Australian. My parents are from the UK originally. So the links to the ‘motherland’ are a not really that strong as to be expected.
I have spent all my life outside India, wasn’t even born there.
Yet as I am now in my 30s (the horror) and unmarried my parents have become almost strangers. Suddenly I hear all this talk about how I am ‘bad girl” and a disgrace to my family b/c I am not married. Not to mention what a bad example I am for other members of my extended family and my sisters.
The interesting part is that I have always thought I was a good person. I hold masters level qualifications in my field, have a good job, donate to charity, pay my taxes and am kind to animals. That is something I like about your blog btw the pictures of animals. 🙂
I was wondering whether any of your readers could give me some suggestions on how to deal with the constant pressure. It’s not to say I havent tried. I joined matrimonial sites. But to date nothing. In fact I have been rejected by a number of men because I am not “indian” enough. It is very strange. My mum’s latest line is to tell me that ‘if i was a proper indian‘ I wouldnt be in this mess.
I am not sure what ‘proper indian’ means. But I guess I am a disgrace to my family. That is a bitter pill to swallow. My immediate family members can’t understand why am I not interested in marrying ‘someone from India’ usually on a student visa whose visa is running out. There are unfortunately a lot of them around.
So, does any one have ideas for me? I am loathe to think that this is the be all and end all for me. But everyday I lose a bit more hope.
Thanks ever so much and I look forward to hearing from you.
Not Indian Enough