So how can women-folk want to abort girl children, they are female too!
They can because it is not Men versus Women. Patriarchy and related social evils (preference for male children, dowry, honor killing, forced marriages, joint families, female infanticide and feticide etc) thrive because some people – both men and women, benefit from controlling the lives of many other people (both men and women).
In a traditional set up, parents of sons generally benefit from patriarchy and so if they want such benefits badly enough, whether they are mothers or fathers, they both would be willing to abort a girl baby.
Why is it thought that a mother would be reluctant to abort a female fetus because she was a female fetus once? She is at no risk of being aborted anymore. If there are consequences the man and the woman would both suffer from them. Say if their son doesn’t find a spouse because there aren’t enough women, or if their daughter is sexually assaulted, then the father and the mother would both be affected.
It’s true that Patriarchy oppresses women much more, but this gender bias does not benefit all men (or harm all women equally). Do fathers-of-daughters, or sons-of-victimized-mothers, or men who can’t marry the woman they love benefit from gender bias or Patriarchy? Also, patriarchy encourages women to ‘have’ male relatives – sons, brothers, fathers, even cousins and uncles and husbands (something they have no control over) – thus encouraging female feticide.
Patriarchy benefits some men and some women, and so some men and some women support it in various ways, like by aborting female fetuses or by blaming rape victims (to continue to control women’s lives and sexuality, feel good about themselves as Patriarchy’s loyal foot soldiers, amongst many other reasons).
Controlling women’s freedom and sexuality also forces men to be providers and protectors for adults who should not have needed to be provided for or be protected. It also deprives many men of wholesome relationships with women.
In the long run, Patriarchy benefits nobody – not the individual, not the community. A community is made up of individuals and unless the happiness of all the individuals is valued, the community has failed – like ours has. Nobody really remains unaffected like Amir Khan explained so simply in Satyamev Jayate, episode one.
Some more facts.
Parents and families who abort baby girls are not doing this out of love for the male child – this kind of parenting mind-set sees a child as an investment or a commodity.
Men can hate other men (or women), women can hate other women (or men).
I think some of us accept without questioning what culture/tradition/custom/religion/great grand parents/society etc has passed on. And some of us question and think, no matter what kind of environment they grew up in. And Education and even IQ levels don’t seem to matter as much as attitudes. (Maybe because our education doesn’t seem to encourage thinking and questioning?)
It seems it’s mainly the mindset that matters. It’s not uncommon to see narrow minded, prejudiced, insecure and controlling people in families where everyone else is liberal and respects individual rights. Or more commonly, exactly the opposite – one family member who doesn’t understand why some people’s happiness is less important than other people’s happiness. These are the people, men and women, who have spoken against Patriarchy and fought for reforms.