So how does Delhi – NCR Police define Rape?

It doesn’t look like SHO Sunil Kumar, Ghazipur sees forced sex as rape.

“Go to a pub in South Delhi. Go to Greater Kailash where there is free entry for girls. Jinhone 1,000 rupaiye mein wo karna hai wo wahan jati hain. Daru bhi peeti hai aur aap ke saath sex bhi karti hai… Jis din koi thok dega rape ho jayega. (In these places you’ll find girls who want to do ‘it’ for Rs. 1,000. They will drink and also have sex with you. The day somebody uses force, it becomes rape).”

Some in the Police seem to see getting aggressive as a normal reaction to finding a woman sexually attractive.

Ladkiya ek seemit daire main, seemit kapdon main nahi niklengi… to apne aap khichaon ho jata hai. Wo khichaon bhi aggressive kar deta hai ki kar do bas (Sub-Inspector Arjun Singh, SHO Surajpur Police Station, Greater Noida)

The police seems to see 18-20 year old gang-rapists as ‘kids’ and sharing of phone number as consent to be raped.

SHO Jagdish Prasad said: “In the recent DLF case, the girl is 27-years-old, the boys are 18 to 20-years-old. They are kids. She was dancing with these kids in the bar… I am telling you she induced them… the girl came and gave her phone number to them.”

Atleast some in Delhi Police clearly and unbelievably see rape as a normal act and reporting of rapes as a proof of malintent.

“It’s never easy for the victim. Everyone is scared of humiliation. Everyone’s wary of media and society. In reality, the ones who complain are only those who have turned rape into a business.” (Yogender Singh Tomar, Additional SHO, Sector 39, Noida)

What is he trying to say here? That consensual sex with one man is consent to be gang raped by others?

It’s very rare that a girl is forcefully picked up by 10 boys. A girl who gets into a car with boys is never innocent. If she does, she definitely has a relationship with at least one of them.

And here’s one that I could not understand –

Roop Lal of Sector 40, Gurgaon, sought to find a rationale to the occurrence of gang-rape: “Jaise hum log baithe hai, zyaada daaru pee li. Chalte peeli. B********, phekh saala, phir to aise hi hoga. Raat bhar rakh li. Uska jawab kya degi wo apne gharwalon ko, ki jo ek ghante ke liye keh kar gayi hai, aur poori night main kahan gayi thi. To maa-baap to poochenge, bhai bhi poochega. Jinka samaaj hai woh to poochte hai (Say we are sitting and had one drink too many while on the move… it’s obvious that it’ll happen. Keep her for the entire night. What will she tell her parents? She was supposed to be away for an hour and has ended up being out the entire night. Parents will question, so will her brother. Society will ask questions.”

What is he trying to say?

Is there any doubt that the Delhi-NCR Police has no understanding of sexual crimes?

Please read the article, and there is nothing really new here, but it’s horrifying, and it shows exactly why Delhi-NCR stays unsafe for women and their families – In and around Delhi, cops blame rapes on women: Tehelka investigation with NDTV.

Thanks for sharing the link Oasis Greenday.

Related Posts:

Made me think… – Celestial Rays


65 thoughts on “So how does Delhi – NCR Police define Rape?

  1. just forget the police, read the comments on the two sites that people are posting and i am wondering what type of a society do i live in? one who talks of gender equality but at the same time loves to kill the girl in the womb, one who thinks women and girls are just substance of pleasure..nothing beyond…and if you intend to be saved, hide your vital essentials or maybe do away with it…coz every man will look at you in the same way. i feel so helpless…nothing would change…and i think my dreams of having a girl child shatters here…i cannot bring in someone who is labelled a slut only because she goes and dances in a pub or drinks. i dont understand why prostitutes in our country are not considered humans…why just because they sell themselves, they are considered as free to use and raped repeatedly. i dont understand why dont we teach men!


  2. If you read the entire series of articles on Tehelka, the lawyer refers to the two finger test that is done to check if the victim is accustomed to sex. What is the point of this test? How does it matter whether she is accustomed, not accustomed, partly accustomed or has been with 1 man or 10 or a 100? Is there a medical/legal angle to this that I don’t know about? Because to me, the intent of such a test, and the very test seems like a second assault.


  3. It seems to be that this kind of mindset is deep rooted even among the cops who are meant to protect women. Perhaps, they themselves belong to families where they are used to boss over their women. They are men, so they can do anything and expect to get away each time. Now, how do they change their inherent biases? The concept of izzat and the treatment of women as objects still prevails. Women are fighting for more dignity, but there are these kind of men who think of nothing to show their power to an “arrogant” woman. Delhi-Haryana-punjab-UP, it is the same story and same disgusting mindset.


    • I think this mindset prevails across India — women are sexual temptresses who lure men into illicit sexual encounters.

      Perhaps Hindu scriptures are to be blamed for this — the Manusmriti states that women are so lustful that they would sleep with any man if they were allowed to. Women are scheming hussies who wish to enslave and entrap men.

      Such ideas have percolated deep into our collective subconscious.

      There are countless folk parables and proverbs that reinforce such belief systems.

      Every major regional language has proverbs that underscore the need to control women because of their lustful nature.

      The truth is that our culture is terrified of female sexuality and society views rapes through the lens of women tempting men, much as Maneka tempted Vishwamitra.


      • I want to object to you calling manu a hindu scripture. Manusmriti is NOT a hindu scripture. Could we all please stop calling it a hindu scripture? I have read it many times here, which is really surprising, since everybody is so learnt here. It won’t hurt to learn a bit about religion either- at least before we comment. Manu was a normal man who was “apparently” a “saint”/sadhu. I could also turn into a sadhvi in a few years by taking sanyas too..

        If I write a book then, then that book will not be considered hindu scripture, no? Hindu scriptures are vedas, geeta, and to a certain extent ramayana, mahabharata.. See, they are pretty misogynistic, talk about them- I will not complain! Talk about how irritating sita’s behavior was, how galling it is that arjun “shared” his wife with his brothers… But Manusmriti is not a hindu text. It is like saying that kamasutra is also a hindu text.

        It is different!

        Also, indeed all religions are man-made, so all books are really written by hindus, but the other books often make sense too- and they do not go blabbing nonsense like manu all the time- we are allowed to interpret them in our own way. Manu came waaay late. His book is like swami vivekanada’s book, satyartha prakash. Both of them are really thesis and lectures about how one should behave- but you never see people claiming that satyarth prakash is a hindu scripture! Is it because that book is female friendly(and we feminists are once again victims of scoial conditioning)?

        And do read that book, it will blow your mind. 🙂


  4. Am I missing something here.. Police have a duty to enforce law, law to protect people and to find criminals. In other words, they are the people who we should rely on for help, advice and more importantly rely on them to feel safe.

    But here we have an example (one from millions) of how Police are forgetting their responsibility to the wider population. I live in the UK, and never travelled to India, but I have seen and heard plenty (through various mediums) to be able to make my mind up that the Police in India are incompetent and in the pockets of criminals.

    Women in a modern society, need more protection than ever before. It goes without saying, that because women have took on a more independent role, they travel allot more and often independently too. The Police should be out to protect this new change in society instead of instilling fear that women are not safe, even if you decide to socialise in places where men go too.

    I think someone needs to make a protest that the Police salary (which is all they should get) is paid by the average working people, this includes women as well as men.

    I often get the feeling that, rape of a women, has become so common that the Police actually integrate the victim first “what was you doing there? why were you alone? Why was you out so late in the day? Why did you decide to meet this guy? before they decide the case is worth assigning a Police officer for a few ours. Rape of a women is a stab at the whole society. It’s the evil that has surrounded our society throughout history and by now you would have thought enough information was out there for there to be a strictest punishment for the criminals,


    • Police salary is so low its laughable. Which is perhaps part of the problem. Every thing has a cost and comes with a price, if you save on it , complaining about a cheap product is stupid.


      • It’s not our choice to save on it. We pay taxes and the government pays their salaries. Perhaps instead of spending billions on the arms race (and pocketing bribes), an effort should be made to provide basic law and order for ordinary civilians. My heart bleeds every time I read of the billions being spent to acquire a new weapon which could be well spent in so many other places.


  5. Forget everything else. What has stayed with me and irks me is saying that those who report rape are those who want to turn it into a business.
    I cannot express in words decent enough for this blog on how wrong it is at so many levels and how it reinstates the fear of reporting rapes to the police amongst society fearing, honour worshipping people.


  6. So whats the solution? Sensitivity training? Seminars on the pyscological effect of (date)rape? Explaining the concept of rape and violatuon? But who will pay and provide for this?


    • DG was amongst the first batch of TOT, (trainers of trainers) to train senior level police officers to train them in how to police domestic violence in gender sensitive manner. The program never took off because they already knew everything while standing with their hands in their armpits. Same thing happened with the one designed for family court judges. At times one just scratches their head wondering where should they start?

      It won’t happen until men who believe women are human beings and deserve equal rights and protection against sexism start speaking up, louder and clearer. Just like women spoke in the textile mills in early 1900s that even men deserve 8hr day and a day off not just women and children.
      Desi Girl


      • DG, I feel the Women have to cry out against oppression and injustice loud and clear for the change in patriarchal mind set. The role of feminist men is limited. The oppressed getting help from the oppressor happens rarely and one cannot count on it.


        • @Arun,
          Here let me make it easy.
          There is a pie that should be cut into two equal halves but it has been sliced 3/4 and 1/4 for centuries. In order to cut it into two equal halves the one who has had the pleasure of biting the 3/4 has to back off a bit or else the 1/4 share holders cannot do much.

          Now you’ll ask why would 3/4 share holders back off?
          Because in 3/4 stake not all shareholders are equal there are many who hardly even get to the taste the pie.

          According to your premise patriarchy oppresses only women where as DG and others believe patriarchy oppresses both men and women but women in particular. This post will make it more clear.

          Desi Girl


        • DG, I never said men are not oppressed in Patriarchy. What I meant was only the oppressed will revolt against status quo not some one who is benefitted from the status quo. Feminists are not even able to convince majority of women that there is need of a revolt. How can then they can get sizeable number of men to their side? So better to concentrate on sensitising women. Men will follow suit.


      • DG, historically, women have always stood by their men.

        When a community’s men are in trouble, the women always fight alongside them.

        However, very few men have the courage to fight for the safety of their wives, sisters and daughters.

        Most men stick their heads into the sand and pretend that rape is a “female problem”; even when their own wife or daughter is raped.


        • biwo,
          You said ” historically, women have always stood by their men.When a community’s men are in trouble, the women always fight alongside them”
          Women being the oppressed gender, never had any indepence to think and act for themselves. They were forced to obey men. Moreover most women being brain washed by the society, fully supported Patriarchy and willingly became the instrument of oppression. (mother in laws are the typical example).
          That is why several women defend rapists in their own families and try to hide their crime. At the same time you won’t see men defending ‘fallen’ women in their families. Instead they kill them (honour killing).
          So to overthrow Patriarchy, I feel it is always better for Women to try to unite fellow women of other families, caste, class and race instead
          of looking for help from men of their own family.


        • Replying to Arun albeit rather late.

          Yes of course, female support of males has always been unconditional and default, but the same is not true in the reverse.

          The biggest impediment to women’s rights are women themselves (sorry IHM, I know you disagree). 🙂

          But sisterhood is more fragile than brotherhood is, isn’t it?


    • No, the solution is more hand-wringing, victim-blaming and blaming police inefficiency on their low salaries.

      We’ll just go with the flow, won’t we?


  7. This article made me nauseous, and I can’t believe that policemen are talking like this. Serious gender sensitivity campaigns are required. Can one even imagine what the domestic life of these cops might be? They are probably wife (or other female relatives) abusers themselves, considering their neaderthal attitudes..

    I remember reading about a gender sensitivity campaign somewhere in India, where men were chosen to take part, and were regularly subjected to the humiliation that women have to go through. (I can’t remember where it was held!) After that was over, the men displayed a much more sympathetic attitude towards women. Only putting these cops in the shoes of abused women – forced to look over their shoulders all the time, worrying about who to trust, and made to feel responsible for being assaulted – can bring a change or else the country will maintain its grand distinction of being the fourth most unsafe place for women.


  8. It is pretty disturbing trend internationally earlier it was middle aged men now it is the younger lot. Just wondering now when the economies are taking where do they get this money from?
    Check this out
    Desi Girl

    Me – Take a look at this DG, //…one young man from Paris stood in the parking lot of Club Paradise, bragging about his sexual exploits while his friends looked on. The women, he said, did not talk about whether they were being forced to have sex.

    “Maybe,” he said. “But I think they are having a good time.” //


    • @IHM,
      Yes, I read it that was the reason I wanted to share with you and your readers.

      The word was “tanking” not taking. Please correct my typo in the previous comment.
      Welcome back. I saw your post on the adventures of the kid.
      Ping me when you have time have to start planning for that case I told you about. She is desperate. Is it possible to get hold of PT. I have to speak to him about two more cases.
      Desi Girl


  9. These comments are symptomatic of the kind of cultural baggage that governs our thoughts. And it is not just fair to make these officers stand out in terms of harboring and sharing these views. What they believe in is a paradigm which is there in society. Most of us (say in the Universities, corporate sector, activist circles) do tend to think abt the issue on similar lines. What is appreciable however is the fact that through changes in the ways we communicate and discuss things, these issues are brought before us like never before.
    I had a little sense of unease with the way the post has tried to identify the respondents. These statements are in someway our and everyone else’s. And why is that so is a challenge to tackle both at the social and the intellectual plane!
    I hope I am not misunderstood as a sympathiser of the absurdity that the post is nicely trying to present and problematise!


    • Personal Concerns I think it is more dangerous when those who are supposed to fight against crimes (Sexual offenses here) have no understanding of what that crime (rape) is… for example, they don’t seem to see forced sex as rape.


  10. I hate this belief system that seems to have pervaded India and the Middle East (where I don’t even think they view women as human beings) that rape is somehow the woman’s fault for dressing as she does, rather than the man’s lack of self-control, his depravity and his inability to keep it in his pants! I hate to say this IHM, but for all you know, these cops have raped someone themselves. For them a man having sex is a natural thing, he is ‘just fulfilling his natural desires’, but a woman having sex is a ‘slut’/’whore’/ has no ‘izzat’ because of course why should women have sexual desires? Women in their worlds (and not just them, so many people in our society today honestly) are just for cooking/cleaning/’man’s pleasure’, not to fulfil their own existence.


    • I have had policemen wink at me or whistle at me many times, and this even when I was in school uniform. I have never trusted them. Most of them are in that profession not because they want to help or serve, but because of quota/reservations and influence for a Govt job. I have had to pay bribes in police stations, questioned like I made up a false story when there was a major theft at home….my experience with them has always been bad. They deal with all kind of men and women, and they to begin with they only doubt you.


  11. I think the last one is saying that he thinks that if a girl returns home late to her family she would use rape as an excuse instead of saying that she was just out late partying.

    I miss Delhi a lot but I am SO GLAD I do not live there anymore. And in the future if I return to India, I will not live in the NCR again.


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  13. Its not just the police IHM, if you read the comments on such articles on public forums, you will realize that the general tendency is to blame the women.
    It will take decades to wipe off this mentality.


  14. I think these attitudes have always existed. Women have always been told to “be careful” lest something happen to them. Rape has always been treated like a crime without a perpetrator. Hence the shift to victim blaming is easy. The only thing different now is that these views- so far expressed in the privacy of homes or conversations can be so easily proliferated to everyone. But, honestly, how different are they from things we have heard all our lives? Remember the horrible analogy that “izzat” is like a a fruit- it may slip and fall on a knife- it is the knife’s fault but the fruit gets harmed. I have heard that analog from a teacher of mine in Delhi University- and not a very un-progressive person.
    Let us not pretend that we never knew these ideas existed. Why should it surprise us that the police think this way, they are not the most educated of our society.


    • Allytude. The problem with these attitudes is that, in the end, they demonise men.

      Speaking for myself only, I often wonder if it is wise to treat men as fellow human beings when it is so difficult to tell a rapist from a non-rapist.

      I have always believed that men are, like me, humans first and foremost.

      What these attitudes really do is force women to treat ALL men as hormone-driven monsters incapable of restraint.

      How else does a woman protect herself from rape? To do so, she has to assume that ALL men would rape if they could; since the onus of preventing it is hers alone.

      Most women I know don’t have a high opinion of the male gender anyways. Such attitudes will only deepen the instinctive distrust many women have towards men.


  15. I wrote a similar post recently..

    I had quoted two of those statements too.. It was there in TOI.. I was shocked to read those atrocious statements..

    I do not understand why people in India love to blame the victim.. Right from the cops to the common people, both men and women actually blamed the Noida girl who was gang-raped, just because she went out with five men at night !! :O
    How can people ignore the fact that she is the victim, and she is the one who is suffering!
    Here is the link to my post :


    • Agree with what you have written, //She feels scared for she knows that her city is unsafe for women..She feels violated when someone tries to hit her or touch her..She feels humiliated when men stare at her and her assets..She feels disgusted when her family tells her that its unsafe to go out to market alone at night..

      When? When will you stop blaming her?//


    • Education has little to do with how men treat women. For example: let us take the case of my grandparents, from both sides of the family.
      My maternal grandfather is a 10th pass, and worked in a post office as a clerk until the kashmir uprising forced all Hindus to migrate and he became unemployed. All his life, he treated my granny is a servant. She would wake up earlier than him, she spend ALL her time in the kitchen(to the point that all kids called her the kitchen-wali-mamma.) NOT only that, he abused her verbally all the time, and stuff. She does not sleep on a bed- she sleeps on the floor while he sleeps on the bed (when people are around, at least. I don’t know about when they are alone, but usually they aren’t alone.)
      She is “allowed” of her house once/twice a month only, because “she can’t take care of herself”/ “she is immature and stupid” etc. They lived in srinagar. [He has changed now because my sister screamed at him once in anger about how disgusted she felt when she visited them and he should be ashamed of himself- yes something similar, less rude but just as direct. They don’t talk anymore, but my grandfather now treats my granny with respect. Imagine if somebody had shouted at him when they were young? If he could change at this age, can you imagine how much happier their lives would have been? A happy wife makes a happy husband.]

      Compare that with my paternal grandfather. He never went to school, though he did teach himself urdu (remember kashmir, which does excuse some of my nanu’s faults). Yet, he always treated my granny with respect. She was never treated like a servant. They were really good friends. My granny was more intelligent and mature than my grandfather. Everybody says so. And his ego wasn’t hurt in admitting this. He did not think she wasn’t capable of going out of the house. They lived in a village- bhandipur (u must have heard the name, a lot of terrorist attacks happen there)

      Compare the two situations and tell me what education, surrounding had to do with it? There are many numerous people in this world who fight for other people, because they CHOOSE to. They weren’t taught this in school. I wasn’t taught in school to be secular(most children got to catholic skls, but they choose to be secular.)

      It is not about money or anything like that- if a person isn’t self- centered or egoistic or socially conditioned or afraid to act because of society, then he will automatically notice another person’s suffering. Most women on this blog are rebels. We are rebels because we chose to fight- education has nothing to do with it. Engineering has nothing to do with it.


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  28. Can someone give me a cricket bat….I had enough listening to these. Trying to blame the victime… hypocrites…I feel like beating these people up…they way they are saying it they might be rapists themselves. ….erghhhhh


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