If a 13 or 14 year old child has sex with a man in his early twenties would you call that having an ‘affair’? Or is it child abuse? (Legally this would be rape.)
If the man is related and is free to walk into and stay in her house, and if he tells her he loves her (but can’t marry her, can meet her in lonely parks, can beat her and claims to have photos of her to blackmail her with) and if she believes she loves him too – would this be ‘love’?
If she has seen her mother and almost every other woman being brutalized by their spouses, is it not natural that she sees this abuse and violence as a normal part of a man-woman relationship or…‘being in love’?
If this married man, then tells her if she does not run away with him he would show her photos to her family, would you say her fear is a result of western culture and too much freedom for youth?
Or a result of criminal neglect by an irresponsible society?
We do not believe in guiding innocent children about such ‘dirty’ things. We don’t care how they learn. We prefer it if they don’t. We believe good girls and boys have curiosity about only what we approve. (Click to read)
Would you say such a victim has brought shame on everybody and herself?
Can she really be blamed? She probably learnt whatever she needed to know about relationships through her surroundings, movies, cheap books and this man.
The rapist/abuser might threaten to ‘leave’ the female relative he is married to, if he is challenged. And that is a serious threat.
He gets to call the shots.
Knowing how our society sees ‘getting and saving a marriage at all costs’ as a woman’s goal in life, the female relative might worry about her own future.
I wonder if there isn’t something very basically wrong with a society that works so hard towards empowering the abuser so blatantly.