Honor killing or Police trying to save it’s ‘honour’?

When I first heard about Aarushi being found dead in her bed in her house in NOIDA, I thought it must be a break-in by a tribe, Kachcha Banian Gang that robs houses after killing the victims in their sleep (by hitting on the head), in Noida, Gurgaon, Delhi, Ghaziabad area. This tribe, wears only underwear and rubs oil on their body to slip away if caught. They also eat in the victims house, and defecate outside the house. They are nomads and keep chicken, which they kill and eat. But basically they kill by hitting on the heads with a blunt object, the victim dies in sleep.
Was Aarushi Talwar really killed by her father to save the family honour? How could they leave a girl-child alone at home with a male servant? Didn’t they expose her to the risk of being abused? If the parents were genuinely concerned about her, what the Indian Press calls, ‘intimacy’ with the servant Hemraj (shouldn’t it be called child abuse, she would have been fourteen today!) couldn’t they have just fired the servant and sent the girl abroad or to a distant boarding school? We live in India, not Saudi Arabia. I know of men having relationships outside their marriage and their children know of it, they don’t kill their children for objecting.


HOW CAN THEY CALL KILLING OF A VICTIM OF CHILD ABUSE AN ‘HONOR KILLING’? AND YOU HAVE TO HEAR THEIR DESCRIPTION OF HONOR KILLING! ONE REPORTER ON AAJ TAK (or was it another channel of the same kind, Zee News/Star News?) SAYS ‘Yadi yeh Honor Killing ka case hai to yeh apne aap mein ek anokha, ekdum anootha, ekdum alag case hoga’ . (If this is a case of honor killing it will be a different/rare and amazing/awesome case.” The word he used is ‘anokha‘ which is generally used for describing something that is unusual, unique but not bad, heinous or disgusting.
Our TV News channel need some lessons in gender sensitization. I remember them repeatedly describing the victims of New Year Eve molestation by mob in Mumbai, as skimpily dressed.

The evidence is all, only circumstantial.
There are too many loopholes,
1.) The motive for killing seems unsubstantial.
2.) Why was there no noise? No screams? The mother heard nothing in the next room.
3.) Why is her mother silent…common sense says she is the mother, must be in no condition to say anything…maybe that is she is silent. Why didn’t she fight to save her only child, if she was at home at the time? ‘Times Now‘ said she told a visitor during her daughter’s condolence meeting that she had reached home at 3 am that night, by then Aarushi had been killed.
4.) There is no proof of any relationship between the servant and the child. Even if he saw such a thing he would have killed the servant, not his child.
5.) Could the Police be making such a shoddy case to protect someone?
6.) Couldn’t it be the old servant (who brought Hemraj as a substitute in his absence, but Hemraj was given permanent job by the Talwars, who then fired the older servant). Could it be that now he was trying to take revenge? Revenge seems a more plausible motive then ‘honour’. He lost his job to Hemraj. He had worked for them so he knew his way around the house, he could have had a key to the house….?
7.) Whose hand prints are there on the wall? How did the bloodied mattress reach the terrace?
Too many questions.


I was relieved to hear many viewers say that if the child had a ‘relationship’ (Again, I repeat, how can the Police call it a relationship, how can a 45 year old man and a 13 year old girl have a ‘relationship‘? It’s child-abuse!) with the servant, the parents could have sent her to another place, no viewer seemed to think that was motive enough for the father to kill his daughter. Much as the UP Police wants to make it sound like killing in the name of family honor is a norm in educated middle class Indian families, it is not.
Our Police also loves to talk about ‘illicit relationships’ of any kind, with or without substantial proof. Watching this case on TV makes me wonder what kind of people have we got in our police force? Even the officers look and talk so ….creepily?


21 thoughts on “Honor killing or Police trying to save it’s ‘honour’?

  1. The loss of such a young and promising life in such a heinous way was tragic. The media coverage has been largely deplorable.


  2. Gross 😦 😦

    Media should draw a line some where………….. Plz just don’t go for TRP and stuff (Media isn’t doing a good job, the standard of journalism is deteriorating rapidly 😦 ………. its a shame )


  3. Dipali I just saw the natya-rupantar (dramatization)on Star News, it is so disgusting. We need some laws to stop this sort of trauma to the family. Until and unless something is proven, they have no business to show such cheaply enacted, vulgar dramatization.


  4. While the Police handle (or mishandle) this case, the media takes the mantle of investigator upon itself. In addition, the reporters also are the commentators – and they comment in a voice that I find detestable. Practically all the channels now possess at least one anchor who has the extreme capabiity to churn your stomach with his/her style. While we like to protect our children from violence and blatant display of sex in films, how do we protect them from irresponsible media and reporters?


  5. Heh. We really have a great police force. They were not able to find the body of Hemraj for two days when it was right there on the terrace of that house! Therefore, I am going to wait until some concrete evidence shows up.

    That being said, if Talwar is the murderer, I’d say flog him in public and then hang the bastard. There’s nothing ‘anokha, ekdum anootha, ekdum alag’ in honor killing as the media says. It’s been going on for centuries in India.

    The Indian media makes me throw up with it’s disgusting style of news coverage. Shucks.


  6. Sachin So true it seems they can’t see beyond TRP, whatever the cost. And they are so quick to believe the worst! Aaj Tak, Star Plus and Zee News sound ike vulgar, B Grade movies. I saw at least 24X7 show DPS, Noida students objecting to the way media talks about their friend, a little girl of 14.


  7. Manpreet I completely agree with you, some of these channels are so cheap, they are completely unsuitable for young children. What we watch as news on some of these channels are the commentators personal opinion served as News. One perverted reporter described this news as ‘sensational news’. I found 24X7 to be in better taste.


  8. Krishna Araadhi They seem to be an educated family and I find it difficult to believe that they would kill their only child, born after eleven years of being married, and not for family HONOR(sic!). Accidental death, in a fit of anger, though horrifying is believable, but planning and killing a child in cold blood, their own child? By someone who has no record of violence? Honor killing of a 14 year old in Urban India???? I find these difficult to digest. From their past performance, I find it easier to believe that NOIDA police is looking for someone to blame.


  9. This whole thing has me so upset. th e police are doing a lousy job of investigating..the case has soo many loop holes… I only pray that Aarushi receives justice and that the truth is out soon.


  10. Nothing is convincing enough in this case. Seems like a lot is not told. Even if they were swapping or having affairs or the child was going along with someone or it was a child abuse ..WHAT EVER it was , does not make sense or enough reason to kill your own child. They were rich and educated , dont they have this much sense. Cannot trust police.


  11. Swati Even if they were wife swapping – of which the police has no proof, or even if there was child abuse, I doubt if any urban Indian family will feel the need to kill their child. I feel our great police found no one else to blame, so they decided to catch the father, without any convincing explanations or proof.. I can’t imagine what they might be going through.


  12. How evil do you have to be to kill your own child ? And those bloody Aaj-Tak waalahs . They interview the family members of someone who died by asking questions like “Aapko kaisa lag raha hai ? ” . I would have shoved the mike down his throat ! Yellow journalism to the hilt . I remember a time when these news channels were too risky to watch with the family , when the MMS scandal bug had bitten them.


  13. The STOP HONORCIDE! campaign was launched on Mother’s Day 2008. The goal of the campaign is to prosecute honorcides to the fullest extent of the law. We want honorcide to be classified as a hate crime and we advocate for every existing hate crime legislation to be amended to include honorcide.



  14. Pingback: Who do you think killed Aarushi Talwar? « The Life and Times of an Indian Homemaker

    • I remembered this post and wanted to see what I wrote three years ago on the same news, then realised it had no tags, (because it was shifted from Blogspot) – so I added tags and updated it and it seems when we update a post it shows up in the Reader as a new post!


      • ok, some days ago you mentioned a tag something like why I love my country that you started in your blog, I was thinking if you would like to start a new tag Girls/women we’re proud of or something like it. You get a lot of emails from people who have done something which you feel happy or pround, or you can tag your posts like that Chhavi the sarpanch post and that domestic help you talked about some days ago under this tag. I am a little bad in expressing myself clearly and properly, but I hope you got the drift. Or you might already have a tag like this? If you do, please tell which one. I’d like to read such posts, you know so that I know where some women are kicking ass. πŸ™‚


  15. Pingback: Nupur and Rajesh Talwar convicted under sections 302 (murder), 201 and 34 (common intention) | The Life and Times of an Indian Homemaker

  16. Pingback: ‘We grew up in a very liberal family. We knew what our limits were and our focus was our education. We never betrayed our parents.’ | The Life and Times of an Indian Homemaker

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