Part I of a long comment I received, and some doubts I have.
“By the law of nature, the characteristics of male gender is different from female gender. Women give birth to children whereas men cannot. Hence, for the welfare of women certain customs were formulated. It is infact from the mother that any child inherits its good habits or bad manners. Even though Father influences, the mother is the first teacher and the mother’s milk is directly fed to the child. Also, these days so many diseases are considered to be genetic. Diabetes, eye problems, blood related problems, skin pigmentation. So, dont you think the great rishis in those days who formulated certain codes, were right in giving lot of importance to the way in which marriages should be performed or the way in which women should conduct themselves. It is a well known fact that, when one gets angry, there are several hormones are released in the body which are not good. Hence, women are generally advised to remain calm, because you can not just cultivate certain qualities when you need it, like during the time of pregnancy. If the children do not inherit good values, or good culture then they are of no use to the society.”
I have some queries.
1. Should the children not inherit qualities of courage, confidence, intelligence and the capacity to think for themselves?
2. Are no harmful ‘hormones released’ when a woman is feeling helpless, frightened or resentful or frustrated or outraged at the ridiculous expectation from her in the name of tradtions etc?
Please note: Any anger or violence in a child’s environment is bad, even that which is directed at the mother.
3. What if such customs teach her to timidly adjust to injustice? Timidity is bad. How will she provide a hundred brave, bold and daring sons if she is timid? (I hope we aren’t already facing the results of this lack of foresight …)
4. In case of the spouse’s death they are made to stop living a normal life- is that also for the welfare of the childen? Shouldn’t women be able to raise them on their own if required?
5. If a woman’s biggest job is to give birth and to raise good children sons, and if they are the teachers of their children, should they not be empowered, educated, and have a say in how their children are raised?
6. Finally what if she is not able to have children?
I hope our ancestors did not advise us to abandon them, or to bring home another baby-making-machine?
And I hope it was kept in mind that it takes two to make a baby, and these women (who you say were worshipped like goddesses) were in a position to point this out.