Scribblehappy shared this video about saving the girl child, on her blog. The video is supposed to encourage parents to have (not to kill) daughters.
At an Ultrasound Clinic, the mother in law says, “Bahu I want only a boy.“
How does the bahu react? She doesn’t confidently smile and remind her mother in law that sex selection was a crime. Or that unlike their own narrow, oppressive existence women in this same nation, right in their neighbourhood, were living great, independent and happy lives.
Instead she looks like this :( A future like this makes the idea of having a daughter attractive?
Her husband places his hand on her shoulder, it’s not clear whether to support her, or to restrain her. (If it’s for support then he needs to do more than that).
Makes it look like it’s pathetic to be a married adult Indian woman. Would this encourage Indian parents not to abort their daughters?
Most Indians believe Getting Married-and-Staying Married is every good Indian girl’s goal. How hopeful about a girl-child’s future would the husband below make parents feel? Please do take a look at his face.
Such campaigns seem to say it’s okay for a daughter in law to be the lowest in the family hierarchy. This video could make having sons look comparatively attractive. For one, nobody asks sons to produce male heirs.
Those who think daughters in law must handle their relationships with in laws without the husband’s support (or intervention) must remember the power of this hand on her shoulder. Since it’s often the man’s family demanding a male child, men have more power in such situations. Why not make videos showing men doing more than putting a weak hand on a spouse’s shoulder? This son should have been shown making it clear to his parents that he did not think having a daughter was a bad thing. And not because the daughter would be willing to use her brother’s old books.
What do you think of what they hear their unborn daughter say?
“Ma (echo). Ma (echo) Ma.
Ma god has not yet drawn destiny-lines on my hands. And even before that ( a sob) you have all decided my fate?
Ma let me live. I swear on myself, I will never trouble you. Ma don’t worry about my school fees, I will use my brother’s books and educate myself on my own. And yes, tell Papa, not to worry about my dowry, I will stay with you and be your budhape ka sahara. And if you still feel I will be a burden on you, then you don’t need to spend on this operation, I will myself pray to god (pause) to let my mother see my dead face. (Meri maa mera mara moonh dekhe).
Yes, the last line is disturbing, but is it going to make those who don’t value girl children start valuing them?
So this is the pressure a girl should live with all her life? Be easier to raise, have no expectations from parents? Is it right to make it look like letting a girl be born is a favor she must repay by being a good girl all her life? How confident would such a child grow up to be?
Instead the girl baby could have been shown reminding her parents that if they gave her good education, love and respect; she would grow up to be self confident and self reliant, and they would have no reason to worry about getting her married – the traditional Indian parents’ biggest worry. Click here to see the kind of video that would make most Indian parents see what love, respect, confidence and equal opportunities can do to any child. Why not use such examples? Can you picture Chhavvi being asked to produce a male child? :)
But here the mother in law is moved by the reassurances from the unborn grand daughter. She, and not the parents, is shown as the decision maker.
The young woman looks visibly relieved that she has the permission to have this child. This scene would encourage Indian parents to have daughters, and look forward to them having such a life?
The couple doesn’t walk out together. The mother in law leads the grateful and obedient bahu out. The budhape ka sahara looks on, satisfied. Aal iz well.
Does this video make it look like it’s fun to be a young, married female family member in a traditional Indian family? And we still wonder why our rigid Patriarchy makes Indians kill their unborn baby girls.
Such videos can make Indian parents feel guilty about aborting female fetuses, but they don’t make them see daughters as worth having because they reinforce everything that makes it difficult for Indian parents to raise daughters.
Here are two ads that don’t show girl children as a responsibility to be handed over to the rightful owners (with dowry).
Without treating the cause, no problem can be solved. There’s more to having a daughter than saving for her dowry.